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some people believe that it is good for students to take off after high school for work or travel. However, other believe that it is a bad idea to take a break between high school and university studies. Discuss both views and include your opinion. v.2

some people believe that it is good for students to take off after high school for work or travel. However, other believe that it is a bad idea to take a break between high school and university studies. v. 2
Nowadays, the gap year is becoming more and more popular among the students. Many individual’s belief that its better option to take a drop for work or explore places after secondary high school. however, other group of people support that it is poor decision to take rest between intermediate school and collages. I will discuss the both the points and give my judgment in further ensuring paragraphs. On the one hand, there are many benefits to students who should take leave for doing work or explore nations after the secondary school. First and foremost, in the gap year pupils have the best chance to explore the nations and gain knowledge about different languages, different cultural skills and get real world experience. In these ways, students can truly identify themselves and get relax psychologically and physically form their studies. Moreover, by doing job after the college preparatory school one can make money for their university’s expenses, which means students can know the value of money. However, there are some deficits of choosing the gap year. Student loses their interest in education and forget the information about they had studied in school due to money which comes they work and attracted to the lavish life style. On the other hand, also there are many merits of who believes that undergraduate student should study continuously till to the end of university educations. Firstly, many students find difficulty to restart their study after gap year. Therefore, without taking break, a student can stay focused on their collage studies, they don’t lose their study skills. Secondly, student finish higher education earlier to get a high paying job sooner and after take break the study one can explore the nations. However, students are too young for what they want, they just choose the study due to the peer pressure of family. No practical work and only theory lead to students burning out mentally. In conclusion, in my opinion, a student should choose a gap year because they can be pre-prepared themselves mentally, financially and see the real-world closely.
Nowadays, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
is becoming more and more popular among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
individual’s belief that its better option to take a drop for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
explore
places after secondary high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, other group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
support that it is poor decision to take rest between intermediate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and collages. I will discuss the both the points and give my judgment in
further
ensuring paragraphs.

On the one hand, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who should take
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
for doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
explore
nations after the secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
First
and foremost, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
pupils have the best chance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
explore
the nations and gain knowledge about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
languages,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultural
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
real world experience. In these ways,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
truly
identify themselves and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
relax
psychologically
and
physically
form their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
.
Moreover
, by doing job after the college preparatory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
one can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
money for their university’s expenses, which means
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can know the value of money.
However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
deficits of choosing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Student
loses their interest in education and forget the information about they had studied in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
due to money which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and attracted to the lavish life style.

On the other hand
,
also
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
merits of who believes that undergraduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
continuously
till to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of university educations.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
find difficulty to restart their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
Therefore
, without taking break, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
can stay focused on their collage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
, they don’t lose their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
finish higher education earlier to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a high paying job sooner and after take break the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
one can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
explore
the nations.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are too young for what they want, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
choose the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
due to the peer pressure of family. No practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
theory lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
burning out mentally.

In conclusion
, in my opinion, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
should choose a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can be
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-prepared
themselves mentally,
financially
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the real-world
closely
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
42Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay some people believe that it is good for students to take off after high school for work or travel. However, other believe that it is a bad idea to take a break between high school and university studies. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
342 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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