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Some people think that students in high school should study music as a compulsory school subject. Others believe that such a requirement would be a waste of valuable school study time. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.1

Some people think that students in high school should study music as a compulsory school subject. Others believe that such a requirement would be a waste of valuable school study time. v. 1
Nowadays, studying music is becoming increasingly popular. Although some people believe that the music should be a part of the student's curriculum, others think that it is a waste of time. This essay will discuss why studying music is a beneficial thing for the human's soul, despite being a waste of time. As well as, provide evidence as to why benefits overweigh drawbacks, which is my opinion. Studying music has beneficial effects on human's soul. It, from the past until now, teaches human beings to be quiet and relaxed. Moreover, it enriches their soul with good morals, values and manners. In fact, there is a recent study has done on two groups of children: the first one study music during their courses and the other group do not. This research has concluded the first group of children is more quiet and calm than the Second one. For these reasons, studying music plays a crucial role in students' lives. While studying music has many advantages, it has many disadvantages, as it wastes a lot of time. Students prefer listening to music instead of doing their homework. Furthermore, it will avoid them from studying their main subjects such as: Math, Geography, and Biology. For example, if everyone keen on studying music, there will be no doctors or engineers in the future. Therefore, making music a part of students' courses is a time wasting. In conclusion, whether or not, studying music is an argumentative issue. Even though, some people think that it should be a compulsory school subject, others say that is a waste of valuable school study time. From my point of view, the positive effects of the debate over studying music will always be greater than the adverse effects.
Nowadays,
studying
music
is becoming
increasingly
popular. Although
some
people
believe that the
music
should be a part of the student's curriculum, others
think
that it is a
waste
of
time
. This essay will discuss why
studying
music
is a beneficial thing for the human's soul, despite being a
waste
of
time
.
As well
as, provide evidence as to why benefits
overweigh
drawbacks, which is my opinion.

Studying
music
has beneficial effects on human's soul. It, from the past until
now
, teaches human beings to be quiet and relaxed.
Moreover
, it enriches their soul with
good
morals, values and manners. In fact, there is a recent study has done on two groups of children: the
first
one study
music
during their courses and the other group do not. This research has concluded the
first
group of children is more quiet and calm than the Second one. For these reasons,
studying
music
plays a crucial role in students'
lives
.

While
studying
music
has
many
advantages, it has
many
disadvantages, as it
wastes
a lot of
time
. Students prefer listening to
music
instead
of doing their homework.
Furthermore
, it will avoid them from
studying
their main subjects such as: Math, Geography, and Biology.
For example
, if everyone keen on
studying
music
, there will be no doctors or engineers in the future.
Therefore
, making
music
a part of students' courses is a
time wasting
.

In conclusion
,
whether or not
,
studying
music
is an argumentative issue.
Even though
,
some
people
think
that it should be a compulsory school subject, others say
that is
a
waste
of valuable school study
time
. From my point of view, the
positive
effects of the debate over
studying
music
will always be greater than the adverse effects.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that students in high school should study music as a compulsory school subject. Others believe that such a requirement would be a waste of valuable school study time. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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