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Some people think that once they start a new book, they should finish it, others don’t feel that way. What is your opinion? v.1

Some people think that once they start a new book, they should finish it, others don’t feel that way. What is your opinion? v. 1
People are able to watch criminal trials on television in some countries. I believe that broadcasting criminal trials can bring about more advantages to societies than any disadvantages they might bring. On the one hand, societies can greatly benefit from showing trials on television. Firstly, criminals who have malicious intents are discouraged from carrying out their plans because of fear. In other words, watching other criminal trials and seeing their punishments can threaten them and force them to forsake their plans, thus, keeping society safe. Secondly, people have a feeling of security and justice when they see criminals being punished in front of them, especially when these criminals offended them or someone they know. This can be exemplified by witnessing the punishments of murderers or other offenders which can be satisfying to people and prove to them that their country is just. On the other hand, there are some minor drawbacks of allowing people to watch what is happening in every trial. It can frighten children as they might be watching television either alone or with their parents. The whole atmosphere in the court is rather harsh and not suitable for children to watch as they might see the terror on people’s faces and hear inappropriate words. Moreover, broadcasting trials can bring shame to offenders alongside their families. Consequently, people might start bullying offenders’ families, who can be good and kind citizens. In addition to that, when offenders finish serving their prison sentences, they can be faced with difficulties in finding employment, therefore, leading them to commit crimes again. In conclusion, showing criminal trials on television is advantageous to societies since it threatens existing criminals as well as make citizens feel secure and safe.
People
are able to
watch
criminal
trials
on
television
in
some
countries. I believe that broadcasting
criminal
trials
can bring about more advantages to
societies
than any disadvantages they
might
bring.

On the one hand,
societies
can
greatly
benefit from showing
trials
on
television
.
Firstly
,
criminals
who have malicious intents
are discouraged
from carrying out their plans
because
of fear. In
other
words, watching
other
criminal
trials
and seeing their punishments can threaten them and force them to forsake their plans,
thus
, keeping
society
safe.
Secondly
,
people
have a feeling of security and justice when they
see
criminals
being punished
in front of them,
especially
when these
criminals
offended them or someone they know. This can
be exemplified
by witnessing the punishments of murderers or
other
offenders
which can be satisfying to
people
and prove to them that their country is
just
.

On the
other
hand, there are
some
minor drawbacks of allowing
people
to
watch
what is happening in every
trial
. It can frighten children as they
might
be watching
television
either alone or with their parents. The whole atmosphere in the court is
rather
harsh and not suitable for children to
watch
as they
might
see
the terror on
people’s
faces and hear inappropriate words.
Moreover
, broadcasting
trials
can bring shame to
offenders
alongside their families.
Consequently
,
people
might
start
bullying
offenders’
families, who can be
good
and kind citizens.
In addition
to that, when
offenders
finish serving their prison sentences, they can
be faced
with difficulties in finding employment,
therefore
, leading them to commit crimes again.

In conclusion
, showing
criminal
trials
on
television
is advantageous to
societies
since it threatens existing
criminals
as well
as
make
citizens feel secure and safe.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that once they start a new book, they should finish it, others don’t feel that way. What is your opinion? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
284 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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