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Some people think that newsapers are the best media to learn and get information from while others believe that the internet is a better source. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.2

Some people think that newsapers are the best media to learn and get information from while others believe that the internet is a better source. v. 2
In this contemporary world, due to advances in technology, the world has become a small place. Half the population feels that newspapers are the biggest source of information. Whereas, others believe that the Internet is better than other sources of information. I want to shine on both sides and give proof of why the newspaper has its benefits, but why the Internet is a more effective way. To begin with, there are many benefits to reading a newspaper. First and foremost, by daily reading, it helps to enhance reading skills as it has a higher level of language. In addition, reading also improves vocabulary and grammar. As a result, a person who reads the daily newspaper is able to understand the language quickly and speak fluently. In addition, reading newspapers is an effective way to spend free time. Additionally, anyone can read them at any time. For example, many people use newspapers that help to spend time acquiring knowledge, instead spending it on phones that affect their eyes and brain. On the other hand, there are opposing tones, saying that the news is better presented on television or on the web. First, the web is providing content for online learning. Because of this, everyone gets a chance to learn something for free. For example, the latest studies prove that in the last 6 years, the percentage of students studying using this facility have been increasing rapidly. Last but not least, this source of news provides worldwide information. Also, if helps raise awareness among people on globally important things. For example, with the help of the Internet, every country is aware of the corona virus which is the most harmful disease. To surround the whole notion, I gather that the web authority of news is a more useful source because it has more properties than others. Newspapers are a good way to increase language skills. However, online facilities provide news to everyone quickly.
In this contemporary world, due to advances in technology, the world has become a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
place. Half the population feels that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
are the biggest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
of information.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, others believe that the Internet is better than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
of information. I want to shine on both sides and give proof of why the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
has its benefits,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
why the Internet is a more effective way.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
.
First
and foremost, by daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
, it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to enhance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as it has a higher level of language.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
vocabulary and grammar.
As a result
, a person who reads the daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
is able to understand the language
quickly
and speak
fluently
.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
is an effective way to spend free time.
Additionally
, anyone can read them at any time.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to spend time acquiring knowledge,
instead
spending it on phones that affect their eyes and brain.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are opposing tones, saying that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is better presented on television or on the web.
First
, the web is providing content for online learning.
Because of this
, everyone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
a chance to learn something for free.
For example
, the latest studies prove that in the last 6 years, the percentage of students studying using this facility have been increasing
rapidly
. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
provides worldwide information.
Also
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
raise awareness among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
on globally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
things.
For example
, with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of the Internet, every country is aware of the
The term "coronavirus" (= disease) is spelled as one word.
corona virus
which is the most harmful disease.

To surround the whole notion, I gather that the web authority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is a more useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it has more properties than others.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Newspapers
are a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way to increase language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
However
, online facilities provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
to everyone
quickly
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that newsapers are the best media to learn and get information from while others believe that the internet is a better source. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
322 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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