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Some people think that learning news from newspapers is the best way. Others, however, say that there are more effective ways of learning news from other media. Discuss both points of view and give your opinions. v.1

Some people think that learning news from newspapers is the best way. Others, however, say that there are more effective ways of learning news from other media. v. 1
In this technological age, there are many ways to conduct both local and international news. Some people claim that the most suitable way to learn news is from reading newspapers. While others argue that getting resources from media is the most effective learning. In this essay, I will discuss from both points of views with relevant examples. On the one hand, newspapers are the best way to get reliable news. Although it takes more time to publish, most of the papers never print out without getting complete information. For example, we can avoid some of the fake news posted by other media that make us anxiety. Moreover, it does not need to become adaptive to sophisticated devices that are popular today. The readers can easily access all kinds of news not only with cheap prices but also with trust area. On the other hand, media plays a vital role in order to get both local and international news, unlike traditional newspaper. For instance, there is a wide range of unlimited information where we can get in a short time. Moreover, the media offers not only up-to-date news also an animation for audiences so as to get relaxation. Furthermore, we can surf lots of media channels by sitting at home and clicking the mouse. So, we no longer need to go out and can save more time and energy. In conclusion, although we can learn by reading newspapers regularly, it is hard to go out together with sheet of papers in this modern world. So, from my point of view, tracing news from different media is the best way to get many sources and with a short time.
In this technological age, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways to conduct both local and international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
claim that the most suitable way to learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is from reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
others argue that getting resources from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is the most effective learning. In this essay, I will discuss from both points of views with relevant examples.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
are the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
reliable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
. Although it takes more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to publish, most of the papers never print out without getting complete information.
For example
, we can avoid
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
fake
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
posted by other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us anxiety.
Moreover
, it does not need to become adaptive to sophisticated devices that are popular
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. The readers can
easily
access all kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
prices
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
with trust area.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
plays a vital role in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
both local and international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, unlike traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
.
For instance
, there is a wide range of unlimited information where we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
in a short
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
offers not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
up-to-date
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
also
an animation for audiences
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
relaxation.
Furthermore
, we can surf lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
channels by sitting at home and clicking the mouse.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, we no longer need to go out and can save more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and energy.

In conclusion
, although we can learn by reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
regularly
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to go out together with sheet of papers in this modern world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, from my point of view, tracing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
sources and with a short
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that learning news from newspapers is the best way. Others, however, say that there are more effective ways of learning news from other media. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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