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Some people think that it is the responsibility of governments to take care of the environment, while others believe that it is the responsibility of people to take care of the environment. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

Some people think that it is the responsibility of governments to take care of the environment, while others believe that it is the responsibility of people to take care of the environment. v. 1
In the recent times, we have seen a rising concern on globalisation across the world. However, some individuals have different views about whether the protection of the environment is under responsibility of government or of people. In my view, I believe that it should be a joint duty of the government and the citizens to take measures towards saving our surroundings. Some people believe that government plays a vital role in environmental improvement. To start with, the government has a great influence on environmental conservation. By stating various laws and policies regarding environmental issues, the government is able to control and supervise the factories and industries, which effectively regulate the pollutions ejection and sewage discharge. In addition, the government is responsible to emphasize the importance of environmental preservation. As some uneducated people are unconscious of the consequence of pollution, the government should educate them with environmental awareness, for example, promoting ecological activities or encouraging garbage recycle, which boosts the environmental interests of people. On the other hand, some people insist that government cannot achieve conservation without the help of its citizens. We have seen pollution as a main concern across the big cities. We as individuals should start by taking small initiatives such as, a car share to work or using public transport, which could help in reducing the pollution levels. We could also, jointly support the government by reducing the use of plastic bags and also help in recycling our waste products. In conclusion, the government has imposed various rules and regulations to reduce pollution and create awareness. In my view, the citizens have to also, work towards protecting our surroundings, it should be a joint responsibility of the government and the individual to protect the environment.
In the recent times, we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a rising concern on
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
across the world.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views about whether the protection of the environment is under responsibility of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
or of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In my view, I believe that it should be a joint duty of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and the citizens to take measures towards saving our surroundings.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
plays a vital role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
improvement. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has a great influence on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
conservation. By stating various laws and policies regarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
issues, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is able to control and supervise the factories and industries, which
effectively
regulate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollutions
ejection and sewage discharge.
In addition
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is responsible to emphasize the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
preservation. As
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
uneducated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are unconscious of the consequence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should educate them with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
awareness,
for example
, promoting ecological activities or encouraging garbage recycle, which boosts the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
interests of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
insist that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
cannot achieve conservation without the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of its citizens. We have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
as a main concern across the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
cities. We as individuals should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
by taking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
initiatives such as, a car share to work or using public transport, which could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in reducing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
levels.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
We
could
also
,
jointly
support the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
by reducing the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of plastic bags and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in recycling our waste products.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has imposed various
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and create awareness. In my view, the citizens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
also
, work towards protecting our surroundings, it should be a joint responsibility of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and the individual to protect the environment.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay Some people think that it is the responsibility of governments to take care of the environment, while others believe that it is the responsibility of people to take care of the environment. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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