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Some people think that instead of preventing climate change, we need to find a way to live with it. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.3

Our earth has experienced a drastic climate change compared to the past. In fact, I agree with those who feel that they should find other ways to deal with climate change. Firstly, people must reduce the usage of electricity. As it has chemicals that are harmful to the environment and can be one of the ways that involve in climate changes. To illustrate, people can minimalize the usage of air condition as it contains hazardous chemicals like CFC that can affect the climate changes in the environment. Although the majority of people in big cities need air condition in every places, we can reduce its usage by shutting down the air condition while it is not used. Thus, the importance of saving energy is very useful to hinder the climate changes become higher. Secondly, the majority of people should self-conscious and obey the regulations that have been made by the government. Each of us should realize that all disasters and climate changes are happening because of our own attitude towards our environment. Flood, for instance, it is commonly caused by the various rubbish that have been thrown with no responsible to the lake. Therefore, these rubbish might stuck in the sewer and caused heavy flood that prejudice everybody. Furthermore, some knowledge about the effect of climate change may change people's perspective in climate change. In conclusion, reducing extreme climate change in our area can be done by saving energy and be self-conscious. I, therefore, remain firmly convinced that explore some other ways to deal with climate change is a wisest decision.
Our earth has experienced a drastic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
compared to the past. In fact, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with those who feel that they should find other ways to deal with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the usage of electricity. As it has chemicals that are harmful to the environment and can be one of the ways that involve in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
. To illustrate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
Possible spelling mistake found.
minimalize
the usage of air condition as it contains hazardous chemicals like CFC that can affect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
in the environment. Although the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
cities need air condition in every
The noun should probably be in the singular form: “place”?
places
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
its usage by shutting down the air condition while it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
.
Thus
, the importance of saving energy is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful to hinder the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
become higher.

Secondly
, the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should self-conscious and obey the regulations that have
been made
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
. Each of us should realize that all disasters and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
are happening
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
attitude towards our environment. Flood,
for instance
, it is
commonly
caused by the various rubbish that have
been thrown
with no responsible to the lake.
Therefore
, these rubbish might
The modal verb ‘might’ requires the verb’s base form.
stuck
in the sewer and caused heavy flood that prejudice everybody.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
knowledge about the effect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's perspective in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.

In conclusion
, reducing extreme
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
in our area can
be done
by saving energy and be self-conscious. I,
therefore
, remain
firmly
convinced that explore
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other ways to deal with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
is
Use “the” with the superlative.
a
wisest decision.
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IELTS essay Some people think that instead of preventing climate change, we need to find a way to live with it.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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