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Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependant on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. Discuss and give your own opinion. v.2

Nowadays, some people claim that modern era makes people more reliant on one another, whereas others assert that we are dependent-free. In my point of view, humans became more independent on each other more than any time in history. First and foremost, as modernization develops, necessity of people grows dramatically. Since life gets more difficult and complex, people, especially youngsters, tend to be rely on one another. For instance, the rents, properties, food and others daily life needs are at exorbitant prices. Furthermore, due to people’s busy schedule and high ambition, they need to socialize and get to know people from different walks of life and this creates a wider circle in which people’s interaction and reliance on each other increase. On the other hand, it is undeniable that the era which grows day in day out, made some changes in our lives and it lead us to more self-dependent individuals. The progress of the technology has made us more self-reliant and we love to take advantages of the modern tools and devices to make things of our own. For instance, many people these days pick an online lesson than getting admitted to a training institute. Many of us even have the freedom to work from home and this is an obvious shift in the way we earn our living. To wrap it up, as discussed above, I am convinced that people have become more independent, in spite of their dependence on others in certain aspects.

Nowadays, This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 claim that modern era This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createsconstructsmanufacturesproduces
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 more reliant on one another, whereas others assert that we are dependent-free. In my point of view, humans became more independent on each You use this word too often, consider replacing it withnewalternativemore
other
 more than any time in history.

First
 and foremost, as modernization develops, necessity of You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 grows dramatically
. Since life This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquires
gets
 more difficult and complex, You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
, especially
 youngsters, tend to be The past participle is required after “to be”.relied
rely
 on one another. For instance
, the rents, properties, food This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:and many more
and others
 daily life needs are at exorbitant prices. Furthermore
, due to You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people’s
 busy schedule and high ambition, they need to socialize and This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquire
get
 to know You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 from This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:various
different
 walks of life and this creates a wider circle in which You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people’s
 interaction and reliance on each You use this word too often, consider replacing it withnewalternativemore
other
 increase.

On the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withnewalternativemore
other
 hand, it is undeniable that the era which grows day in day out, made This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :altersadjusts
changes
 in our Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).lives, and
lives and
 it After ‘it’, use the third-person verb form “leads”.leads
lead
 us to more self-dependent individuals. The progress of the technology has made us more Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).self-reliant, and
self-reliant and
 we This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :admireadore
love
 to take advantages of the modern tools and devices to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createconstructmanufactureproduce
make
 things of our This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :possess
own
. For instance
, This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a plethora ofa number ofnumerous
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 these days pick an online lesson than getting admitted to a training institute. This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a plethora ofa number ofnumerous
Many
 of us even have the freedom to work from home and this is an obvious shift in the way we earn our living.

To wrap it up, as discussed above, I am convinced
 that You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 have become more independent, This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:notwithstanding
in spite of
 their dependence on others in certain aspects. 