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Some people think that healthcare should be free for everyone other thing that people should pay for their medical cost them self discuss both view and give your opinion. v.1

Some people think that healthcare should be free for everyone other thing that people should pay for their medical cost them self v. 1
It is no doubt that health is a wealth. Nowadays, it is impossible obtain the goals in life without healthy lifestyles. Certain individuals ponder that health care should be free for everyone. However others reckon that people should give the money for their treatment, which can be costly. I deem that medical centre should be free in order all people because it is the best way for saving the life of people. I will not only explain the both viewpoints, but also add my own opinion before any specific conclusion in the below paragraphs. On the one hand, those masses who claim that medical treatment ought to be free for everyone in the world at present. First reason is that, people know very well about the disease of corona virus, which is the spreading in all nations of world. Many people have addicted this pandemic. Due to, the world of all countries have been lockdown by the government. Because of this, people have to spend time with family sitting in their houses. They are not able to go anywhere they want as well as earn the wages. Some people, like poor and old feel weakness. Corona virus tests are not inexpensive for these kind of people. As a result, the rate of death is increasing day by day. Nevertheless, individuals ponder that medical care should be free. Moreover, it is a basic responsibility of the authorities do not charge for health service. To cite an example, people have to invest the tax to the authorities for approaching the new service. Even if a person is ill at their home and has no money for the treatment. So, the government should treat as soon as earliest. In this way help for the person lives longer in the world. On the flip side, others claim that the government should receive the capital from patients. Firstly, there are not chances of receiving the hi-tech machinery. For example, even if the government does not offer the free treatment, then they are not able to maintain the system of hospital. The authorities earn money and pay to the doctors. As well as expert doctors will proper treatment of patients. Subsequently, public believe that health care should be costly. To conclude, even though health is a wealth, which is maintained by the treatment of people, but both exercise and sports are playing a considerable role in order to well being. However, I suggest that health care should be free, as it is the great plan for the fitness body of an individual. Like as, Canadian government is providing free medical service to the patients in order to prevent the life.
It is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
is a wealth. Nowadays, it is impossible obtain the goals in life without healthy lifestyles. Certain individuals ponder that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
for everyone.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
others reckon that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should give the money for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
, which can be costly. I deem that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
in order all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is the best way for saving the life of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. I will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the both viewpoints,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
any specific conclusion in the below paragraphs.

On the one hand, those masses who claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
ought to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
for everyone in the world at present.
First
reason is that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
about the disease of
The term "coronavirus" (= disease) is spelled as one word.
corona virus
, which is the spreading in all nations of world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have addicted this pandemic. Due to, the world of all countries have been lockdown by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
.
Because of this
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend time with family sitting in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
. They are not able to go anywhere they want as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as earn the wages.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, like poor and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
feel weakness.
The term "Coronavirus" (= disease) is spelled as one word.
Corona virus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
are not inexpensive for
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
As a result
, the rate of death is increasing day by day.
Nevertheless
, individuals ponder that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
should be free.

Moreover
, it is a basic responsibility of the authorities do not charge for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
service. To cite an example,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
invest the tax to the authorities for approaching the new service. Even if a person is ill at their home and has no money for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should treat as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as earliest. In this way
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
for the person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
longer in the world.

On the flip side, others claim that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should receive the capital from patients.
Firstly
, there are not chances of receiving the hi-tech machinery.
For example
, even if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
does not offer the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
, then they are not able to maintain the system of hospital. The authorities earn money and pay to the doctors. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as expert doctors will proper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
of patients.
Subsequently
, public believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
should be costly.

To conclude
,
even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
is a wealth, which
is maintained
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
both exercise and sports are playing a considerable role in order to
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
.
However
, I suggest that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
, as it is the great plan for the fitness body of an individual. Like as, Canadian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
service to the patients in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the life.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
45Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that healthcare should be free for everyone other thing that people should pay for their medical cost them self v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
444 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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