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Some people think that genetically modified crops are a positive development. Others, however, argue that they are potentially dangerous. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.2

Some people think that genetically modified crops are a positive development. Others, however, argue that they are potentially dangerous. v. 2
Nowadays, genetic engineering is known as the science of manipulating genes of organism and the new researches on human and crops is on the increase. A group of people believe that genetically modified crops are a significant progress in modern life while a large number of the residents of the world suffer from famine and starvation. Others, however, refute this. Both views will be discussed. Recent developments in genetically modified crops bring benefits for governments and people, especially farmers who have strong effect on the food industry. The first important positive effect of accessing to such a progress is harvesting the crops with fewer defects, so the farmers are more satisfied with the better yields of desirable crops. In addition, they can benefit the abundant amount of the high quality crops which brings them a good avenue. The second great impact of such products is that governments and sales companies can export products of high quality to other countries which improves the economy. On the other hand, there are some strong arguments against genetically modified crops. It is believed that the result of these manipulations is not vivid and nobody knows what devastating effects it may have in the future. Besides, it can lead to some unknown diseases with debilitating consequences among people. To support my claim, I can refer to an article having been published in Times magazine, indicates that the number of unknown ailments is accelerating rapidly all across the globe. To sums up, although genetic engineering could access extraordinary achievements in recent years, the result of researches is hazy for people. It needs to be more clarified among people who are the consumers of these products.
Nowadays, genetic engineering
is known
as the science of manipulating genes of organism and the new researches on human and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crops
is on the increase. A group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
genetically
modified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crops
are
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "significant progress".
a significant progress
in modern life while
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
the residents of the world suffer from famine and starvation. Others,
however
, refute this. Both views will
be discussed
.

Recent developments in
genetically
modified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crops
bring benefits for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
especially
farmers who have strong effect on the food industry. The
first
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect of accessing to such
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "progress".
a progress
is harvesting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crops
with fewer defects,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the farmers are more satisfied with the better yields of desirable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crops
.
In addition
, they can benefit the abundant amount of the high quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crops
which brings them a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
avenue. The second great impact of such products is that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and sales
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
can export products of high quality to other countries which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the economy.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
strong arguments against
genetically
modified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crops
. It
is believed
that the result of these manipulations is not vivid and nobody knows what devastating effects it may have in the future.
Besides
, it can lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
unknown diseases with debilitating
The usual preposition to use after "consequences" is not "among". Did you mean "consequences of", "consequences for", or "consequences on"?
consequences among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. To support my claim, I can refer to an article having
been published
in Times magazine, indicates that the number of unknown ailments is accelerating
rapidly
all across the globe.

To sums up, although genetic engineering could access extraordinary achievements in recent years, the result of researches is hazy for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. It needs to be more clarified among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are the consumers of these products.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Some people think that genetically modified crops are a positive development. Others, however, argue that they are potentially dangerous. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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