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Some people think that environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. v.4

Some people think that environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. v. 4
Many people believe that problems that are related to the environment should be tackled at the world level while others say it has to be soughed out in the national boundaries only. I firmly believe that protection of the atmosphere is the responsibility of the every individual; it must be handled at global level. On the one side, people are arguing the environment should be protected at global level as environment is mainly related to the air quality, which is blowing continuously. If the air quality of one country will be lower, it will surely impact the surrounding nations badly. For instance, Corona virus is getting viral from China to the other country through air and people. The ratio of dying persons from this virus is gradually increasing and it is urgent to take necessary steps to save the people at international level. People cannot get rid off from this disease if it will be tried to tackle by one country only. On the flip side, some people are claiming that the efforts of the natives of the one country are sufficient to keep the environment safe for their own people. At the proper disposal of the garbage is crucial to save the environment and it will impact to residents of the country, the country which will not dispose of the garbage accurately, will face the negative consequences, it will not affect to other countries in the short term. Water wastage will have worse consequences for the habitat of one country or state. So it can be saved by the hard work of the people of the particular country. In conclusion, I will reiterate that environment protection is the global responsibility, in the short run it might be controlled at national level but in the long run, countries have to joint hand together to protect the environment from each kind of damage and pollution, otherwise it will have the vulnerable effect on everyone including on animals.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that problems that
are related
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
should
be tackled
at the world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
while others say it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be soughed
out in the national boundaries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
. I
firmly
believe that protection of the atmosphere is the responsibility of the every individual; it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be handled
at global level.

On the one side,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are arguing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
should
be protected
at global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
is
mainly
related to the air quality, which is blowing
continuously
. If the air quality of one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
will be
Did you mean "lowed", "lowered"?
lower
, it will
surely
impact the surrounding nations
badly
.
For instance
,
The term "Coronavirus" (= disease) is spelled as one word.
Corona virus
is getting viral from China to the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
through air and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The ratio of dying persons from this virus is
gradually
increasing and it is urgent to take necessary steps to save the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
at international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid
Did you mean "of" ('get rid of' = 'discard' or 'get free of')?
off
from this disease if it will
be tried
to tackle by one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
.

On the flip side,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are claiming that the efforts of the natives of the one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
are sufficient to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
safe for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. At the proper disposal of the garbage is crucial to save the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
and it will impact to residents of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
which will not dispose of the garbage
accurately
, will face the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences, it will not affect to other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in the short term. Water wastage will have worse consequences for the habitat of one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
or state.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it can
be saved
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of the particular country.

In conclusion
, I will reiterate that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
protection is the global responsibility, in the short run it might
be controlled
at national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in the long run,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
joint hand together to protect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
from each kind of damage and pollution,
otherwise
it will have the vulnerable effect on everyone including on animals.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
326 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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