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Some people think that environmental problems should be solved in a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. v.1

Some people think that environmental problems should be solved in a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. v. 1
Undoubtedly, environmental problems have been increasing at a higher pace, and it needs to be handled now before it becomes worse. While some believe that it should be taken care by the whole planet, others assert that individual nations should fix it. I strongly agree with the former notion; I will explain both sides of arguments and also why I agree with the context of the problem to be managed by people all over the globe. Firstly, the environment difficulties should be managed by an individual country. It is the whole-sole responsibility of a nation to keep its place protected with any harm that might occur within, as it can be monitored and handled easily by the local departments. It should be, moreover, the responsibility of the country’s government to take care of their countrymen and their surroundings. In the UK, for instance, it has been observed that they have 70% less pollution than their previous records because of their measures in handling the problems caused. Thus, to these supporters, the administration of each country should play its part in their region. Others, , including me, opine that the corrections should be done on a worldwide level where everyone must come together and resolve the issue that our mother-earth is facing. The problem can be solved when every nation take their steps and come forward to resolve the issue altogether. If one part of the world is taking steps to diminish the concern and some other part is increasing it with their negligence, it is then taking us nowhere in solving the problem. In India, for example, it has been observed that they have more pollution than any European country, which is a disaster. When we all are united as one on our planet, why not take steps together and make the world worth living? Thus, I entirely agree with the idea of joining our hands with countries all over to solve the existing problems. In conclusion, although environmental problems are seen elevating rapidly, without any measures, it would further worsen. It should be the responsibility of each and every person staying on this lovely planet to play their part in resolving the issue by taking measures, being at the country-level or globe-level. I firmly believe that the measures taken jointly with people all around would prove to be highly beneficial in resolving this problem.
Undoubtedly
, environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
have been increasing at a higher pace, and it needs to
be handled
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
it becomes worse. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that it should
be taken
care by the whole planet, others assert that individual nations should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
it. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the former notion; I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
both sides of arguments and
also
why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the context of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
to
be managed
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
all over the globe.

Firstly
, the environment difficulties should
be managed
by an individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. It is the whole-sole responsibility of a nation to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
its place protected with any harm that might occur within, as it can
be monitored
and handled
easily
by the local departments. It should be,
moreover
, the responsibility of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to take care of their countrymen and their surroundings. In the UK,
for instance
, it has
been observed
that they have 70% less pollution than their previous records
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
measures
in handling the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
caused.
Thus
, to these supporters, the administration of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should play its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
in their region.

Others,
Two consecutive commas
,
including me, opine that the corrections should
be done
on a worldwide level where everyone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
together and resolve the issue that our mother-earth is facing. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
can
be solved
when every nation take their steps and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
forward to resolve the issue altogether. If one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
of the world is taking steps to diminish the concern and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
is increasing it with their negligence, it is then taking us nowhere in solving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. In India,
for example
, it has
been observed
that they have more pollution than any European
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, which is a disaster. When we all
are united
as one on our planet, why not take steps together and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the world worth living?
Thus
, I
entirely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of joining our hands with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
all over to solve the existing problems.

In conclusion
, although environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
elevating
rapidly
, without any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
measures
, it would
further
worsen. It should be the responsibility of each and every person staying on this lovely planet to play their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
in resolving the issue by taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
measures
, being at the country-level or globe-level. I
firmly
believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
measures
taken
jointly
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
all around would prove to be
highly
beneficial in resolving this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Knowledge of languages is the doorway to wisdom.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay Some people think that environmental problems should be solved in a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
395 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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