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Some people think that environmental problems are too big for individuals to solve, while others think that the government cannot solve these environmental problems unless individuals make some action. v.9

Some people think that environmental problems are too big for individuals to solve, while others think that the government cannot solve these environmental problems unless individuals make some action. v. 9
Pollution becomes a major concern in society all over the world. In society, not only an individual but also groups of people live. In society, it is everyone’s responsibility to protect the environment. Environmental problems caused by pollution, for example, fuel gases, cutting of trees, gases released by factories. The government should take responsibility to reduce pollution in order to protect the environment. Every individual who is leaving in society should take responsibility to participate in protecting the environment. Firstly, people should grow trees in their houses, premises and colonies. By growing trees there are huge advantages, for example, most of the polluted gases took over by trees and they release the oxygen. Everyone should not throw the wastages on the roads, maintain a healthy environment by using the dustbins. At the same time if we consider the government’s role: the government have authority to protect the environment. By planting the trees all over the places, for example, all government places, besides the roads, schools, and parks etc. , what I know this type of programme called a clean and green environment. Thus the pollution can be controlled.   Cleanliness is very important to maintain a healthy environment, hence government should emphasise the cleaners to clean the area thoroughly. Should place the dustbin every street and educate the individuals by advertisements. Inspect the houses every month to check how the individuals maintain their houses so that the individuals reflect themselves and self-correct themselves. Conduct environmental talks in the school, that individual learns everything from childhood onwards in the school. I believed that it is every individual’s responsibility to solve the environmental problems, however, impossible for only one individual in the society. So that government should take actions to solve the environmental problems but encourage every individual to takes part in all those activities.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Pollution
becomes a major concern in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
all over the world. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
groups of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
, it is everyone’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibility
to protect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Environmental
problems caused by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
,
for example
, fuel gases, cutting of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
, gases released by factories. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibility
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
in order to protect the environment.

Every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
who is leaving in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
should take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibility
to participate in protecting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should grow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
, premises and colonies. By growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
there are huge advantages,
for example
, most of the polluted gases took over by
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
trees and
they release the oxygen. Everyone should not throw the
Possible spelling mistake found.
wastages on
the roads, maintain a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
by using the dustbins.

At the same time if we consider the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
role: the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
have authority to protect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
. By planting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
all over the places,
for example
, all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
places,
besides
the roads, schools, and parks etc.
Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
,
what I know this type of
Possible spelling mistake. 'programme' is British English.
programme
called a clean and green
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
can
be controlled
.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Cleanliness is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to maintain a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
,
hence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
Possible spelling mistake. 'emphasise' is British English.
emphasise
the cleaners to clean the area
thoroughly
. Should place the dustbin every street and educate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
by advertisements. Inspect the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
every month to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
how the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
maintain their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
reflect themselves and self-correct themselves. Conduct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
talks in the school, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
learns everything from childhood onwards in the school.

I believed that it is every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibility
to solve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
problems,
however
, impossible for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should take actions to solve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
encourage every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
takes part
in all those activities.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
43Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that environmental problems are too big for individuals to solve, while others think that the government cannot solve these environmental problems unless individuals make some action. v. 9

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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