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Newspapers have an enormous influence on people’s opinions and ideas. Do you think it is a positive or negative situation? v.5

Newspapers have an enormous influence on people’s opinions and ideas. Do you think it is a positive or negative situation? v. 5
Newspapers play a vital role in the society because of its influential abilities. It has a huge impact on the thoughts of people in various manners. In my opinion, newspapers can act as a constructive tool if used in a positive and fair manner, but it can also be a lethal weapon for society, if in wrong hands. Starting from the freedom fight of our nation, the newspaper had played a major role in the awakening of common man. As the result of that, our nation got independence. In today's world, newspaper act as the centralized chain to spread about what is happening all around. It enlightens people about the crisis situations which help them to be prepared and take all the preventive actions needed. It also makes the common people aware of the economy of the nation and helps public to know about their elected leaders. On the other hand, a biased news in the newspaper, lead to a negative influence on the reader's mind and can adversely affect the perceptions of the reader. Nowadays, newspapers publish model photographs just to raise their sales. Some of the newspapers are being used by political leaders, in order to create their fake image to get political benefits. As a result of growing competition and commercialization, newspapers can easily break the thin line of an ethical barrier, which can have negative on the society. To sum up, there is a great saying that the pen is more powerful than the sword so newspaper plays an important role in developing the opinion, either positive or negative, in the society.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Newspapers
play a vital role in the society
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its influential abilities. It has a huge impact on the thoughts of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in various manners. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
can act as a constructive tool if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
manner,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it can
also
be a lethal weapon for society, if in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
hands.

Starting from the freedom fight of our nation, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
had played a major role in the awakening of common
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
. As the result of that, our nation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
independence. In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
act as the centralized chain to spread about what is happening all around. It enlightens
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
about the crisis situations which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
be prepared
and take all the preventive actions needed. It
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the common
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
aware of the economy of the nation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
public to know about their elected leaders.

On the other hand
,
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "biased news".
a biased news
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
, lead to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
influence on the reader's mind and can
adversely
affect the perceptions of the reader. Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
publish model photographs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to raise their sales.
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
Some of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
are being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by political leaders, in order to create their fake image to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
political benefits.
As a result
of growing competition and commercialization,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
can
easily
break the thin line of an ethical barrier, which can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
on the society.

To sum up, there is a great saying that the pen is more powerful than the sword
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in developing the opinion, either
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
, in the society.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Newspapers have an enormous influence on people’s opinions and ideas. Do you think it is a positive or negative situation? v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
266 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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