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Some people think that economic progress is the only way to measure a country’s success, while others think that there are other factors which can be used to measure a country’s success. What are these factors? Which, of all factors, do you think are most important? v.9

Some people think that economic progress is the only way to measure a country’s success, while others think that there are other factors which can be used to measure a country’s success. What are these factors? Which, of all factors, do you think are most important? v. 9
The issue on the measuring factor of a country’s success has always been debatable among economists, where, some believe that the only method to measure it is the economic growth, however, another panel of people consider several other factors for the country’s success. In my opinion, education is the foremost criteria for deciding the country’s achievements. The standard of education, health status and human rights are the other major deciding methods for the nation’s growth. A good teaching provided by well established schools, colleges and universities plays an important role in preparing the people for the better future prospects and job opportunities. Secondly, an easily accessible comprehensive health service given by hospitals helps to decrease the mortality and morbidity rate and thus, subsequently raising the life expectancy. Thirdly, equal human rights for all the citizens of the nation irrespective of their gender, socioeconomic status, religion, ethnicity, race and literacy level further helps in measuring the nation’s achievements. In my view, higher literacy rate achieved by good degree level is the most important criteria to predict the success rate. In fact, higher study level has considerable effect on the other two deciding factors. For instance, a good educational background is required by the health care professionals to be trained in their respective fields, the scientists for the new research, the lawyers to protect the human rights, and the strong work force to run a variety of companies and industries to boost the economy by flourishing the trade worldwide. To conclude, I state that the nations can be assessed and compared with several methods; however standard of education is the best considering factor among all of them.
The issue on the measuring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
of a country’s success has always been debatable among economists, where,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
method to measure it is the economic growth,
however
, another panel of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
consider several other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
for the country’s success. In my opinion, education is the foremost criteria for deciding the country’s achievements.

The standard of education, health status and human rights are the other major deciding methods for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation’s
growth. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
teaching provided by well established schools, colleges and universities plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in preparing the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
for the better future prospects and job opportunities.
Secondly
, an
easily
accessible comprehensive health service
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by hospitals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to decrease the mortality and morbidity rate and
thus
,
subsequently
raising the life expectancy.
Thirdly
, equal human rights for all the citizens of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
irrespective of their gender, socioeconomic status, religion, ethnicity, race and literacy level
further
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in measuring the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation’s
achievements.

In my view, higher literacy rate achieved by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
degree level is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
criteria to predict the success rate. In fact, higher study level has considerable effect on the other two deciding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
.
For instance
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
educational background
is required
by the health care professionals to
be trained
in their respective fields, the scientists for the new research, the lawyers to protect the human rights, and the strong work force to run a variety of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and industries to boost the economy by flourishing the trade worldwide.

To conclude
, I state that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
can
be assessed
and compared with several methods;
however
standard of education is the best considering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
among all of them.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS essay Some people think that economic progress is the only way to measure a country’s success, while others think that there are other factors which can be used to measure a country’s success. What are these factors? Which, of all factors, do you think are most important? v. 9

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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