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Some people think that economic progress is the only way to measure a country’s success, while others think that there are other factors which can be used to measure a country’s success. what are these factors? which, of all factors, do you think are the most important? v.3

It is undeniable that strong economy is essential for any country to prosper. However, economic progress alone does not determine the nation's growth and success. I firmly believe that several other factors such as education, health of citizens, low crimes and good environment of the country also decide the success. To begin with, many countries consider economic growth as fundamental goal, believing it to foster more employment, job salaries and happier citizens. Admittedly, if the economy is strong, there are more jobs in all sectors, and people feel complacent in terms of earning and spending. Secondly, the government too would have adequate wealth for the welfare of the society. In other words, the governing body would allocate funds in infrastructure development and transport networks, providing better life-style to the country-people. Thus, economic growth certainly makes the country powerful. Nonetheless, it would be unfair if economic development alone is marked as prime reason for country's success. Aparently, other areas also contributes significantly in placing the country high on the globe, and out of these factors, education is indispensable factor which advances any region towards the success. Having more educated people can embolden any state because with knowledge, new inventions and opportunities can be built, creating more jobs and better life. Secondly, sound health and environment too plays an important role. Any country cannot consider itself at top if it lacks in healthier citizens and has an unsafe environment to dwell in. For instance, Brazil has strong economy, still it is not considered successful owing to health and education problems in the country. Moreover, if the administrative bodies do not take steps to mitigate crime in the country then it keeps people in fear and depravity, which is never good. Therefore, all these factors highly count while measuring country's success. In conclusion, I pen down saying that economic growth reflects country's prosperity, but to measure any country's success, other factors such as education, healthier citizens, clean environment and crime-free cities should also be considered. Moreover, I believe education is prime factor that should be focused more for measuring nation's growth and development.
It is undeniable that strong economy is essential for any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to prosper.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
progress alone does not determine the nation's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. I
firmly
believe that several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, health of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
, low crimes and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
also
decide the success.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
as fundamental goal, believing it to foster more employment, job salaries and happier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
.
Admittedly
, if the economy is strong, there are more jobs in all sectors, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
feel complacent in terms of earning and spending.
Secondly
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
too would have adequate wealth for the welfare of the society. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, the governing body would allocate funds in infrastructure development and transport networks, providing better life-style to the country-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
certainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
powerful.

Nonetheless, it would be unfair if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
development alone
is marked
as prime reason for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aparently
,
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other
areas
also
contributes
significantly
in placing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
high on the globe, and out of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is indispensable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
which advances any region towards the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. Having more educated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can embolden any state
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
with knowledge, new inventions and opportunities can
be built
, creating more jobs and better life.
Secondly
, sound health and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
too plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role. Any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
cannot consider itself at top if it lacks in healthier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
and has an unsafe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
to dwell in.
For instance
, Brazil has strong economy,
still
it is not considered successful owing to health and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
problems in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Moreover
, if the administrative bodies do not take steps to mitigate crime in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
then it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in fear and depravity, which is never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
.
Therefore
, all these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
highly
count while measuring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country's
success.

In conclusion
, I pen down saying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
reflects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country's
prosperity,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to measure any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, healthier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
, clean
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
and crime-free cities should
also
be considered
.
Moreover
, I believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is prime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
that should
be focused
more for measuring nation's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
and development.
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IELTS essay Some people think that economic progress is the only way to measure a country's sucess, while other think that there are other factors which can be used to measure a country's sucess. What are these factors? And among them which one is more important than others?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
350 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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