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Some people think that developed countries have a higher responsibility to combat climate change than developing countries. Others believe that all countries should have the same responsibilities towards protecting the environment. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.9

Some people think that developed countries have a higher responsibility to combat climate change than developing countries. Others believe that all countries should have the same responsibilities towards protecting the environment. v. 9
It is argued by some that wealthy countries have the higher responsibility for combating climate change as compared to developing countries, while others believe that it is the collective duty of all countries. Although developed nations have the resources, I assert that every country should play its role in reducing the climate transformation. To initiate with, the developed countries can play the major role to combat the climate changes because they have financial resources as well as the skilled workforce which is essential for accomplishing the climate targets. In other words, the citizens of these countries can transform to contemporary technological products which are less harmful for environment, as a result, climate changes will not happen. In Britain, in 2016, for instance, government utilized the financial resources and also established a separate department for combating the climate changes. Hence, the responsibilities of the developed countries are indispensable for this transformation. On the contrary, I underpin with those who claim that it is the joint responsibility of developing and developed nations. This is because all the people live in this world and their footprints are the major contributor of climate changes. People use the cars and clear the land for agricultural purposes, as a consequent, pollution is rising at an alarming rate. To exemplify, a recent study revealed that approximately 75% of world population used the cars for transportation and burnt the forest for agricultural activities. Therefore, all the countries in this world can play a pivotal role to combat the climate changes. To sum up, it can be confidently stated that eventhough developed nations have the resources to fight with climate changes, I concur that it is mandatory for all developed and developing countries to combat the climate changes collectively.
It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have the higher responsibility for combating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
as compared to developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, while others believe that it is the collective duty of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
nations have the resources, I assert that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should play its role in reducing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
transformation.

To initiate with, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can play the major role to combat the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have financial resources
as well
as the skilled workforce which is essential for accomplishing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
targets.
In other words
, the citizens of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can transform to contemporary technological products which are less harmful for environment,
as a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
will not happen. In Britain, in 2016,
for instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
utilized the financial resources and
also
established a separate department for combating the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
.
Hence
, the responsibilities of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are indispensable for this transformation.

On the contrary
, I underpin with those who claim that it is the joint responsibility of developing and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
nations. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in this world and their footprints are the major contributor of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the cars and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
the land for agricultural purposes, as a consequent, pollution is rising at an alarming rate. To exemplify, a recent study revealed that approximately 75% of world population
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
the cars for transportation and burnt the forest for agricultural activities.
Therefore
, all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in this world can play a pivotal role to combat the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
.

To sum up, it can be
confidently
stated that
Possible spelling mistake found.
eventhough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
nations have the resources to fight with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
, I concur that it is mandatory for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
and developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to combat the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
collectively
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that developed countries have a higher responsibility to combat climate change than developing countries. Others believe that all countries should have the same responsibilities towards protecting the environment. v. 9

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
290 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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