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Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.23

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. v. 23
Children are the citizens of tomorrow and their characters are built on their spirit to compete and cooperate. There is always a discussion of being competitive versus co-operative and its importance in their future life. This essay will discuss about the both the views and my personal preference of being competitive rather than cooperative. "To compete" is the basic nature of the human being as we are designed to fight for our survival, be it with any person, animals or our inner-self. The instinct of the competition motivates oneself to strive for excellence and perform the miracles or the unthinkable feats which are considered beyond human reach. On the flip side being over engrossed in competition sometimes can lead to deviating from the path, which results in indulging in unfair practice to win at any cost. For example, the great pole vaulter Sergey Bubka broke his own pole vault record for 26 times and his willingness to fight his own fear and strength is all about the tough and competitive childhood he has gone through. The other viewpoint of being co-operative helps to build a conducive environment that shows the false dawn of camaraderie and harmony, but one tends to get satisfied with the under par achievements. There is a very thin line between co-operation and compromise. Children tend to get satisfied with lesser results and they are unable to explore their true potential because of lack of motivation. For example, we rarely see great games with friendly matches where the team is just not motivated enough to play true to their potentials. In my opinion, we need to instill the right sense of competition in children to make them a future-ready, willing to take all the challenges of future head down.
Children are the citizens of tomorrow and their characters
are built
on their spirit to compete and cooperate. There is always a discussion of being competitive versus co-operative and its importance in their future life. This essay will
discuss about the
both the views and my personal preference of being competitive
rather
than cooperative.

"
To compete
"
is the basic nature of the human being as we
are designed
to fight for our survival, be it with any person, animals or our inner-self. The instinct of the competition motivates oneself to strive for excellence and perform the miracles or the unthinkable feats which
are considered
beyond human reach. On the flip side being over engrossed in competition
sometimes
can lead to deviating from the path, which results
in indulging in
unfair practice to win at any cost.
For example
, the great pole vaulter Sergey
Bubka
broke his
own
pole vault record for 26 times and his willingness to fight his
own
fear and strength is all about the tough and competitive childhood he has gone through.

The other viewpoint of being co-operative
helps
to build a conducive environment that
shows
the false dawn of camaraderie and harmony,
but
one tends to
get
satisfied with the under par achievements. There is a
very
thin line between co-operation and compromise. Children tend to
get
satisfied with lesser
results and
they are unable to explore their true potential
because
of lack of motivation.
For example
, we rarely
see
great games with friendly matches where the team is
just
not motivated
enough
to play true to their potentials.

In my opinion, we need to instill the right sense of competition in children to
make
them a future-ready, willing to take all the challenges of future head down.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. v. 23

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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