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Some people think sport is important to society. Other, however, feel it is nothing more than leisure activity. Discuss both views and give opinion. v.1

Some people think sport is important to society. Other, however, feel it is nothing more than leisure activity. v. 1
At all the times, it has been argued that sport is for leisure or for health of the society. Actually, in fact, both views are correct and do not exclude each other. Nevertheless, either athletics or leisure are important for the well balanced and healthy environment. Personally, I prefer to encourage initial viewpoint, athletics is vital for all of us, as I believe that without training people are miserable and unhealthy. Firstly, pastime solves a bunch of the social problems at once. Thus, daily exercises improve the immune system of the people and trains our mentality. For example, the athletic youths are mostly friendly, loyal and helpful. As they don't need for self expression in the street fights. Moreover, in a sporty surrounding, people are away from the alcohol and drugs, so it is another benefit from athletics to the community and the list of benefits can be continued. Secondly, the game is for healthy recreation. People can spend time in a various ways, and some ways may be harmful not only for that person but for the whole community. For instance, people can smoke, drink, overeat and so on. Obviously, much better to have a rest by swimming, jumping or jogging. In addition, there are big competitions as the Olympic Games, that we watch on the screens, and it is another way we spend our free time. In my opinion, it is crucial for every nation to promote sport among its population. This would solve a lot of existing problems like obesity, crime and conflicts. In conclusion, the idea that workouts are important in terms of athletic games as well as in terms of recreation. Therefore, any kind of physical trainings, street workouts, games and competitions should be encouraged both by the people and by governments in order to keep our world in good physical and moral condition.
At all the times, it has
been argued
that sport is for leisure or for health of the society. Actually, in fact, both views are correct and do not exclude each other.
Nevertheless
, either athletics or leisure are
important
for the
well balanced
and healthy environment.
Personally
, I prefer to encourage initial viewpoint, athletics is vital for all of us, as I believe that without training
people
are miserable and unhealthy.

Firstly
, pastime solves a bunch of the social problems at once.
Thus
, daily exercises
improve
the immune system of the
people
and trains our mentality.
For example
, the
athletic
youths are
mostly
friendly, loyal and helpful. As they don't need for
self expression
in the street fights.
Moreover
, in a sporty surrounding,
people
are away from the alcohol and drugs,
so
it is another benefit from athletics to the community and the list of benefits can
be continued
.

Secondly
, the game is for healthy recreation.
People
can spend time in a various
ways
, and
some
ways may be harmful not
only
for that person
but
for the whole community.
For instance
,
people
can smoke, drink, overeat and
so
on.
Obviously
, much better to have a rest by swimming, jumping or jogging.
In addition
, there are
big
competitions as the Olympic
Games
, that we
watch
on the screens, and it is another way we spend our free time.

In my opinion, it is crucial for every nation to promote sport among its population. This would solve
a lot of
existing problems like obesity, crime and conflicts.

In conclusion
, the
idea
that workouts are
important
in terms of
athletic
games
as well
as in terms of recreation.
Therefore
, any kind of physical trainings, street workouts,
games
and competitions should
be encouraged
both by the
people
and by
governments
in order to
keep
our world in
good
physical and moral condition.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think sport is important to society. Other, however, feel it is nothing more than leisure activity. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
309 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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