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Some people think one should stay all their life in the same job, whereas others advocate changing jobs from time to time. v.3

Some people think one should stay all their life in the same job, whereas others advocate changing jobs from time to time. v. 3
Businessman, skilled workers, office employee’s etc. works during their entire life to meet the financial expenses required to raise themselves and support their families. Experience and skill set they develop by working hard is unparalleled which with time results in marvels and is instrumental in the development of the society. Few people believe that one should continue with the existing employer, while others believe that switching jobs make them more competent. This essay will analyse both sides of the argument before presenting an opinion. Few people believe that it is good for the employees to continue working for their current employer throughout their life span. Proponents of this viewpoint believe that senior employees know the operations and functional nature of their job well which can be fruitful for the company. Their seniority and long term association make them entitled to incentives like gratuity, pension, extended leaves, loans and so on which can be of great value in future. Moreover, working with the same company improves employee and employer relationship and they can move through the hierarchy to attain managerial positions often reserved for credible and senior most employees. For instance, during a recession, companies retain their senior workforce and often newly hired staff ar laid off for cost cutting. Furthermore, they are settled in their existing job and switching workplace can disturb their life. There is no harm in continuing with the same job as long as the company is financially stable and an employee is getting the right exposure. On the contrary, another school of thought believes that people should switch workplace once they feel that their career path is getting saturation and they are not learning new skills. Switching jobs, especially during the early phases of career, is instrumental in getting financial boosts as the employee gets more incentives and a better salary structure. Moreover, few multinational companies prefer employees having diversified experience of working in different industries which are vital for their growth. Furthermore, companies feel that an employee is getting more dependent on them and lack the courage and required skills to explore other job opportunities which can be exploited for their own good. To recapitulate, the aforementioned provides plausible arguments in favour of both views. However, I personally believe that one should continue with the same employers as long as they get competitive salary package, exposure, training and opportunity to progress through the hierarchy to attain senior positions.
Businessman, skilled workers, office
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee’s
etc. works during their entire life to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the financial expenses required to raise themselves and support their families. Experience and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
set they develop by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
is unparalleled
which with time results in marvels and is instrumental in the development of the society. Few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that one should continue with the existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employer
, while others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that switching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them more competent. This essay will
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
both sides of the argument
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
presenting an opinion.

Few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
to continue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employer
throughout their life span. Proponents of this viewpoint
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
senior
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
know the operations and functional nature of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
well which can be fruitful for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
. Their seniority and long term association
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them entitled to incentives like gratuity, pension, extended
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
, loans and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on which can be of great value
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
with the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employer
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
relationship and
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
through the hierarchy to attain managerial positions
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
reserved for credible and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
senior
most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
.
For instance
, during a recession,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
retain their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
senior
workforce and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
newly
hired staff
Possible spelling mistake found.
ar
laid off for
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
cost cutting
.
Furthermore
, they
are settled
in their existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and switching workplace can disturb their life. There is no harm in continuing with the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
as long as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
is
financially
stable and an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
is getting the right exposure.

On the contrary
, another school of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believes
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should switch workplace once they feel that their career path is getting
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
saturation and
they are not learning new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. Switching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
,
especially
during the early phases of career, is instrumental in getting financial boosts as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
more incentives and a better salary structure.
Moreover
, few multinational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
having diversified experience of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
industries which are vital for their growth.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
feel that an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
is getting more dependent on them and lack the courage and required
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to explore other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities which can
be exploited
for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
.

To recapitulate, the aforementioned provides plausible arguments in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of both views.
However
, I
personally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that one should continue with the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employers
as long as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
competitive salary package, exposure, training and opportunity to progress through the hierarchy to attain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
senior
positions.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
39Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Some people think one should stay all their life in the same job, whereas others advocate changing jobs from time to time. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
403 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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