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Some people think foreign visitors should be charged more than local people when they visit the cultural and historical attractions in a country. v.1

Some people think foreign visitors should be charged more than local people when they visit the cultural and historical attractions in a country. v. 1
Today, tourism industry plays a crucial role to show heritage places, habits and customs of each country to foreigners. This industry is a major source of income in many countries. Some believe that tourists visiting these areas must be charged more than the local inhabitants. I personally disagree with this view because I think this plan will have more disadvantages. On the one hand, those who support that, foreign travellers have to pay more for visiting historical places have their own reasons. One is that these people are averagely more well-to-do than the local residents. Paying hundreds of dollars for booking of hotel, airline or visa, foreign tourists are able to afford higher prices to visit these places. In this case, in Isfahan, a historical city of Iran, to visit ‘Menar Jonban’, an old tower located in the centre of the city, foreigners are charged five times more than the local inhabitants. While local citizens have to pay various taxes, foreigners visiting temporarily a place have not paid any tax; therefore, the regional government must charge them in other ways. To repair, renovate or protect these places, the local state will have more budgets. On the other hand, I personally believe that the price of tickets for these locations must be the same for both local and foreign tourists. The first reason behind it is that this plan can avoid decreasing the number of visitors. Clearly, the more they are asked to pay, the less they will travel. As a prime example, had the government of B. C charged those foreigners visiting the national museum of Vancouver, their population would have dropped dramatically; however, by attracting more visitors, this government would have raised its revenue in other sectors, including hotels or public transportation, and foreigners would not have been forced to pay more money for visiting of these locations in Vancouver. Furthermore, this policy can have a huge negative impact on nations` relationships. Definitely, heritage premises are the best ways to show each nation`s culture, whereas increasing these fees will lead other nations to know less about the host country. In additional, this has a negative psychological effect on tourists while they are forced to pay more than the local visitors. They might feel discriminated and would plan to visit other places than spending more on cultural and historical places. Over the year the number of tourists would drop and that would be a bad impact in the long run. In conclusion, although receiving more money from foreign visitors who visit historical places can have several advantages, I personally think that this will cause them to not only have less tendency to visit there again, but the host country will have less opportunity to show its culture to other nations.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, tourism industry plays a crucial role to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
heritage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
, habits and customs of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
. This industry is a major source of income in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
visiting these areas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be charged
more than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
inhabitants. I
personally
disagree with this view
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this plan will have more disadvantages.

On the one hand, those who support that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
more for visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
reasons. One is that these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
averagely
more well-to-do than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
residents. Paying hundreds of dollars for booking of hotel, airline or visa,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
are able to afford higher prices to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
In this case
, in Isfahan, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
city of Iran, to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
‘
Possible spelling mistake found.
Menar
Possible spelling mistake found.
Jonban
’, an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
tower located in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
of the city,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
are charged
five times more than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
inhabitants. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
citizens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
various taxes,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
visiting
temporarily
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
have not paid any tax;
therefore
, the regional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
charge them in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
ways. To repair, renovate or protect these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
state will have more budgets.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, I
personally
believe that the price of tickets for these locations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be the same for both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
. The
first
reason behind it is that this plan can avoid decreasing the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
.
Clearly
, the more they
are asked
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
they will travel. As a prime example, had the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of B. C charged those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
visiting the national museum of Vancouver, their population would have dropped
dramatically
;
however
, by attracting more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
would have raised its revenue in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
sectors, including hotels or public transportation, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
would not have
been forced
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
more money for visiting of these locations in Vancouver.
Furthermore
, this policy can have a huge
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations`
relationships. Definitely, heritage premises are the best ways to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
each
The character between 'nation' and 's' is an accent character, not a standard apostrophe character. Use "nation’s" (curly apostrophe) or "nation's" (straight apostrophe).
nation`s
culture, whereas increasing these fees will lead
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
to know
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
about the host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. In additional, this has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
psychological effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
while they
are forced
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
more than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
. They might feel discriminated and would plan to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
than spending more on cultural and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
. Over the year the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
would drop and that would be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
impact in the long run.

In conclusion
, although receiving more money from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
can have several advantages, I
personally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this will cause them to not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
tendency to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
there again,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
will have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
its culture to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
65Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS essay Some people think foreign visitors should be charged more than local people when they visit the cultural and historical attractions in a country. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
459 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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