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Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reason why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. v.21

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reason why someone should learn a foreign language. v. 21
These days learning languages due to several reasons such as travelling and working abroad widely spreads. Some people believe there are different causes of leaning in addition what is mentioned. I think communication and educating are more important than the previous reasons. In this essay both views will be discussed. Firstly, considering technological developments, people can travel all around the world without knowing even one word of their destination language by gadgets which can interpret simultaneously with speaking. However, job seekers and experts who want to work in a developed country must be bilingual to find a suitable position. Therefore, although, this is a vital ability in working, despite not important for travelling. Secondly, these days human beings tend to have relationships all over the world. Online chatting is an example that if anybody want to join a chat room should communicate with their language. For example, understanding folklore traditions or making close friendships only happen with ability of language speaking. Not only scientists and experts have to learn English or French follow others researches, but also ordinary people who want to comment under a Facebook post must understand the meaning. Therefore, speaking another language is vital for making a relationship and join the amateur or expert groups of discussion. To conclude, being bilingual or multilingual is a superiority for everybody, however, sometimes technology can help us. I believe communication to learn others culture and making friendships is a greater aim of learning foreign language. It can be predicted that in future the gadgets will speak every language needed instead of us.
These days learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
due to several reasons such as travelling and working abroad
widely
spreads.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
causes of leaning
in addition
what
is mentioned
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
communication and educating are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than the previous reasons. In this essay both views will
be discussed
.

Firstly
, considering technological developments,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can travel all around the world without knowing even one word of their destination
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
by gadgets which can interpret
simultaneously
with speaking.
However
, job seekers and experts who want to work in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed country
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be bilingual to find a suitable position.
Therefore
, although, this is a vital ability in working, despite not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for travelling.

Secondly
, these days human beings tend to have relationships all over the world. Online chatting is an example that if anybody
The pronoun 'anybody' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "wants", "wanted".
want
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
a chat room should communicate with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
.
For example
, understanding folklore traditions or making close friendships
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
happen with ability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
speaking. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
scientists and experts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
learn English or French follow others researches,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
ordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who want to comment under a Facebook post
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
understand the meaning.
Therefore
, speaking another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is vital for making a relationship and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
the amateur or expert groups of discussion.

To conclude
, being bilingual or multilingual is a superiority for everybody,
however
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
technology can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us. I believe communication to learn others culture and making friendships is a greater aim of learning foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
. It can
be predicted
that in future the gadgets will speak every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
needed
instead
of us.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reason why someone should learn a foreign language. v. 21

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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