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Some people say that thebonly reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel or work in a foreign country. Other say that these are not the only reason why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both views and give your opinion v.1

Some people say that thebonly reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel or work in a foreign country. Other say that these are not the only reason why someone should learn a foreign language. 1
Advertising has evolved over the last few years. It has been a debatable topic on advertising being the reason in the increase of the sales of certain consumer goods, which would not be needed by the society. I completely agree with his statement because advertising mainly targets the youth, which could easily be influenced. On the one side, there are reasons on why advertising cannot convince the customer to buy products which are not needed by him. Firstly, it depends on the spending power of the customer. This means, if the customer does not have sufficient funds he will not be able to purchase the product in spite of the strong mode of advertising used. In addition, with the advancement of technology, a customer has much more knowledge of the product and its benefits, an attractive advert would not be convincing enough for him to buy a product he would not need. On the other side, effective advertising to a large extend influences the choice of the youth, and make them buy products which may not ne needed by them. First of all, most of the adverts are focussed more on the youth. This is because the younger generation can easily get influenced, especially when they have public figures advertising a product. The youngsters fail to understand whether the product is needed or not. In addition, some of the adverts are available in every mode of communication, making it hard for a consumer to miss it. To illustrate, if there is a new iPhone launched, we see the advert across various platforms like Facebook, emails, Instagram etc. A continuous appearance of an advert can also influence the choice of a customer to a great extend. To conclude, advertising cannot always have an impact on all the customer segment to purchase products that would not be needed. However, the youth can be more easily influenced by continuous adverts which would influence their choice of buying products to a large extend.
Advertising has evolved over the last few years. It has been a debatable topic on advertising being the reason in the increase of the sales of certain consumer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
, which would not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
by the society. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with his statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
advertising
mainly
targets the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
youth
, which could
easily
be influenced
.

On the one side, there are reasons on why advertising cannot convince the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
which are not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
by him.
Firstly
, it depends on the spending power of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
. This means, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
does not have sufficient funds he will not be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
in spite of
the strong mode of advertising
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
.
In addition
, with the advancement of technology, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
has much more knowledge of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
and its benefits, an attractive advert would not be convincing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for him to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
he would not need.

On the other side, effective advertising to a large extend influences the choice of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
youth
, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
which may not
Did you mean "né", "me", or "no"?
ne
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
by them.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, most of the adverts
are focussed
more on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
youth
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the younger generation can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
influenced,
especially
when they have public figures advertising a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. The youngsters fail to understand whether the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
or not.
In addition
,
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
adverts are available in every mode of communication, making it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for a consumer to miss it. To illustrate, if there is a new iPhone launched, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the advert across various platforms like Facebook, emails, Instagram etc. A continuous appearance of an advert can
also
influence the choice of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
to a great
Did you mean the noun "extent"?
extend
.

To conclude
, advertising cannot always have an impact on all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
segment to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that would not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
.
However
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
youth
can be more
easily
influenced by continuous adverts which would influence their choice of buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
to a large extend.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay Some people say that thebonly reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel or work in a foreign country. Other say that these are not the only reason why someone should learn a foreign language. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
329 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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