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Some people say that schools should teach good behavior to children and introduce them to right and wrong. Parents should not only be the ones responsible. To what extent do you agree or disagree. v.1

Some people say that schools should teach good behavior to children and introduce them to right and wrong. Parents should not only be the ones responsible. v. 1
School is a temple for students where they read first page of their life. some people think that parents should not have only duty towards children behaviour but also schools should teach accurate behaviour and ethics to children. This essay will discuss my satisfaction regarding this statement along with some examples. To first and foremost, School is a place where persons are working together for the concept of learning and get feedback. In the initial stage of children, where they try to copying others and develop their skills very sharply. However, Teachers are mentors and students do more trust on them. As a Consequent, children follows their footprints. Students spending longer time in school so they learn more from schools instead of homes. For instance physically and mentally activities are provided by schools which are more prominent for growth and development. Furthermore, Communication is the way to get better response. With the help of school education they are able to communicate with another person and overcome their hesitation. Such as Morale, team spirit, leadership qualities and other basic skills are provided by schools. Meanwhile, Pleasearents are also responsible for children behaviour because they have to give them lesson of their life by some personal examples where children get positivity and they perform well. As a result of it children have good etiquette and right direction towards their life. In conclusion, Children will act according to that behaviour in which they are living so parents should behaves comprehensively. on the other hand In Learning field Tutors should teach them at the level of children and should modify their skills at time to time.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
is a temple for students where they read
first
page of their life.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that parents should not have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
duty towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should teach accurate
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
and ethics to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. This essay will discuss my satisfaction regarding this statement along with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
examples.

To
first
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
is a place where persons are working together for the concept of learning and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
feedback. In the initial stage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, where they try to
Did you mean "copy"?
copying
others and develop their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
sharply
.
However
, Teachers are mentors and students do more trust on them. As a Consequent,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
follows their footprints. Students spending longer time in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they learn more from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
instead
of homes.
For instance
physically
and mentally activities
are provided
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
which are more prominent for growth and development.

Furthermore
, Communication is the way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better response. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
education they are able to communicate with another person and overcome their hesitation. Such as Morale, team spirit, leadership qualities and other basic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are provided
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
. Meanwhile,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Pleasearents
are
also
responsible for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
give them lesson of their life by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
personal examples where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
positivity and
they perform well.
As a result
of it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
etiquette and right direction towards their life.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
will act according to that
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
in which they are living
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
parents should
The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: "behave"
behaves
comprehensively
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the other hand In Learning field Tutors should teach them at the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and should modify their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
at time to time.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that schools should teach good behavior to children and introduce them to right and wrong. Parents should not only be the ones responsible. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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