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Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.9

Leisure time plays a pivotal role in physical and mental well-being of children. Some people assert that children ought to be motivated by their parents to attend activities arranged for groups; whereas, other argues that they should acquire the ability to entertain themselves alone to rejuvenate. This essay will discuss both the views and emphasize my opinion. To begin with, organized group activities allow children to socialize with people in their immediate vicinity. Parents these days prefer their juvenile to participate in extra-curricular/ team activities as they are vital for building skills in non-academic, but equally important areas. One of such activity is camping trips organized by scouting associations, where they can be trained in how to erect tents and other useful practical skills. In addition, other sporting activities like cricket also teach children to respect authority of leaders and to collaborate with others to achieve specific goals. All these skills make a significant contribution to the development of young people into responsible adults. These activities also enhance the confidence levels and interpersonal skills of children. On the other hand, it is suggested by some that it is beneficial for children to do solitary activities in their free time because this can improve their concentration skills. Reading is the most obvious example of an activity requiring this ability and it is likely that it will help children with studying for difficult exams. However, if left alone with electronic devices, many children tend to spend too much time on one preferred activity. Parents should ensure that the time that children spend alone on leisure is limited. To conclude, although, solitary leisure activities have some value for children; it is certainly good to be exhorted by parents into collaborative activities. In my opinion, a balanced approach will be appropriate because both are beneficial for their development.
Leisure
time
plays a pivotal role in physical and mental well-being of
children
.
Some
people
assert that
children
ought to
be motivated
by their
parents
to attend
activities
arranged for groups; whereas,
other
argues that they should acquire the ability to entertain themselves alone to rejuvenate. This essay will discuss both the views and emphasize my opinion.

To
begin
with, organized group
activities
allow
children
to socialize with
people
in their immediate vicinity.
Parents
these days prefer their juvenile to participate in extra-curricular/ team
activities
as they are vital for building
skills
in non-academic,
but
equally
important
areas. One of such
activity
is camping trips organized by scouting associations, where they can
be trained
in how to erect tents and
other
useful practical
skills
.
In addition
,
other
sporting
activities
like cricket
also
teach
children
to respect authority of leaders and to collaborate with others to achieve specific goals. All these
skills
make
a significant contribution to the development of young
people
into responsible adults.

These
activities
also
enhance the confidence levels and interpersonal
skills
of children.

On the
other
hand, it
is suggested
by
some
that it is beneficial for
children
to do solitary
activities
in their free
time
because
this can
improve
their concentration
skills
. Reading is the most obvious example of an
activity
requiring this
ability and
it is likely that it will
help
children
with studying for difficult exams.
However
, if
left
alone with electronic devices,
many
children
tend to spend too much
time
on one preferred
activity
.
Parents
should ensure that the
time
that
children
spend alone on leisure
is limited
.

To conclude
, although, solitary leisure
activities
have
some
value for
children
; it is
certainly
good
to
be exhorted
by
parents
into collaborative
activities
. In my opinion, a balanced approach will be appropriate
because
both are beneficial for their development.
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Language comes first. It’s not that language grows out of consciousness, if you haven’t got language, you can’t be conscious.
Alan Moore

IELTS essay Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
304 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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