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some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. discuss both the views and give your opinion. v.2

some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. v. 2
Many people think that, during the free time kids should be motivated to indulge themselves in the team managed activities. While some shows the opinion that, it is better for them to make up things on their own. In my opinion, I think, children must know how to adapt things while working together. While, on the other side, they should not be dependent all the time on others. Group activities play a vital role in teaching the basics about interaction with other people and methods of grabbing difficult situations. As per the survey, conducted by the student council in 2018, team work improves the mental strength of children very quickly as compared to any other thing. It is considered by many, that behaviour of little ones becomes very calm, as soon as they were playing in a group. It is argued by some that, to make a kid self dependent, they should learn all the things by their own, not only this will improve the possibility of winning, but also discover new methods. According to an article, published in well known newspapers, new inventions were done by the people, who had done most of the work themselves. Working alone is not a bad habit, although this will cut the link with family. To conclude, sometimes it is better to put children in a situation where they have to complete the assignments on their own, but also they must have some knowledge about working together in a team, which further increases their capacity and links. If possible, parents will have to involve themselves with their kids to increase the love bond between them.
Many
people
think
that, during the free time kids should
be motivated
to indulge themselves in the team managed activities. While
some
shows
the opinion that, it is better for them to
make
up things on their
own
. In my opinion, I
think
, children
must
know how to adapt things while working together. While, on the other side, they should not be dependent all the time on others.

Group activities play a vital role in teaching the basics about interaction with other
people
and methods of grabbing difficult situations. As per the survey, conducted by the student council in 2018, team work
improves
the mental strength of children
very
quickly
as compared to any other thing. It
is considered
by
many
, that
behaviour
of
little
ones becomes
very
calm, as
soon
as they were playing in a group.

It
is argued
by
some
that, to
make
a kid self dependent, they should learn all the things by their
own
, not
only
this will
improve
the possibility of winning,
but
also
discover new methods. According to an article, published in well known newspapers, new inventions
were done
by the
people
, who had done most of the work themselves. Working alone is not a
bad
habit, although this will
cut
the link with family.

To conclude
,
sometimes
it is better to put children in a situation where they
have to
complete the assignments on their
own
,
but
also
they
must
have
some
knowledge about working together in a team, which
further
increases their capacity and links. If possible, parents will
have to
involve themselves with their kids to increase the
love
bond between them.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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