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Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to cinema. Others said to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in many cinema. Discuss both the views and give your opinion. v.4

Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to cinema. Others said to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in many cinema. v. 4
The way of people watching movies, which was always debatable, has now become more controversial. The substantial influence of movie watching method has sparked the controversy over the potential impact of this trend in recent years. It is agreed that watching the films on the phones or tablets leads for more selection, while seeing the films with high technology and sound systems in cinema is more interesting and enjoyable. This essay will elaborate the potential ways of watching films and how we can get best out of it, and thus will lead to a logical conclusion. Firstly, there are numerous reasons why people prefer to watch films on their mobiles or tablets, but the most conspicuous one stems from the fact that the wide range of movies are on the internet for their selection. As an illustration, if a person wants to watch a movie which was released in 1970, the easiest way is to download it via internet in tablet or mobile and watch it leisurely. For instance, watching a movie on personal laptop is required only the movie duration unlikely watching a film on cinema because it saves transportation time to go to the theatre. Nevertheless, some people adopt an opposing view and tend to believe watching movies on cinema is important, hence the most salient one is the technology and sound system is in the movie theatre. For instance, large screens, projectors and impressive sound systems are used in the theatre and people do not interrupt with the noises outside the hall. To conclude, I believe watching a movie on the tablet is prominent as it saves the time, money and watching the movie on cinema should not be overlooked.
The way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
, which was always debatable, has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
become more controversial. The substantial influence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
watching method has sparked the controversy over the potential impact of this trend in recent years. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
that watching the films on the phones or tablets leads for more selection, while seeing the films with high technology and sound systems in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
is more interesting and enjoyable. This essay will elaborate the potential ways of watching films and how we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
best out of it, and
thus
will lead to a logical conclusion.

Firstly
, there are numerous reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
films on their mobiles or tablets,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the most conspicuous one stems from the fact that the wide range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
are on the internet for their selection. As an illustration, if a person wants to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
which
was released
in 1970, the easiest way is to download it via internet in tablet or mobile and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
it
leisurely
.
For instance
, watching a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
on personal laptop
is required
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
duration unlikely watching a film on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it saves transportation time to go to the
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
.

Nevertheless
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
adopt an opposing view and tend to believe watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
,
hence
the most salient one is the technology and sound system is in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
.
For instance
, large screens, projectors and impressive sound systems are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not interrupt with the noises outside the hall.

To conclude
, I believe watching a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
on the tablet is prominent as it saves the time, money and watching the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
should not
be overlooked
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to cinema. Others said to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in many cinema. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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