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Some people say that living in high-rise apartments feels very lonely and makes people unhappy. Others say there are advantages to living in a big apartment building. Discuss both views and give your own opinion v.2

Some people say that living in high-rise apartments feels very lonely and makes people unhappy. Others say there are advantages to living in a big apartment building. 2
People have different views about living in apartment tower. While there are several disadvantages in regard to living in such as apartment, I personally believe that pros of those building are deniable. On the one hand, from the last century demand of housing due to explosion of population is increased. Therefore, apartment tower was a practical solution to solve shortage housing problem. In one block, approximately 50 families live and in most of the case they do not even know each other. They just live in small flat which is surrounded with at least 3 neighbors. Some psychologists believe that living with strangers increase the lack of happiness because there is no social behavior or emotional connection among them. For example, whenever one of residents faces with a problem he could not count on his neighbors to help him it is just like that he lives isolate in faraway island. On the other hand, tower blocks have wide range of benefits. Firstly, usually they are often located in premium neighborhoods and have easy access to lots of restaurants, shops and other amenities. Secondly, these have 24 hours door guards which means more securities for residents. Thirdly, high technology also implements in those building so living in those flats are more comfortable and convenient than ordinary houses. For example, one of my friend who lives in such as building has access to dry center and local gym that just located in the ground of his apartment. Finally, people who live in this residential towers have a spectacular view to the city. In conclusion, there are convincing arguments both for and against living in high rise apartments, but I believe that benefit of living in those building would outweigh the drawbacks.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
tower. While there are several disadvantages in regard to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
, I
personally
believe that pros of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
are deniable.

On the one hand, from the last century demand of housing due to explosion of population
is increased
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
tower was a practical solution to solve shortage housing problem. In one block, approximately 50 families
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
and in most of the case they do not even know each other. They
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
flat which
is surrounded
with at least 3 neighbors.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
psychologists believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
with strangers increase the lack of happiness
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there is no social behavior or emotional connection among them.
For example
, whenever one of residents faces with a problem he could not count on his neighbors to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
him it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like that he
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
isolate in faraway island.

On the other hand
, tower blocks have wide range of benefits.
Firstly
,
usually
they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
located in premium neighborhoods and have easy access to lots of restaurants, shops and other amenities.
Secondly
, these have 24 hours door guards which means more securities for residents.
Thirdly
, high technology
also
implements in those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in those flats are more comfortable and convenient than ordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
.
For example
, one of my friend who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
in such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
has access to dry center and local gym that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
located in the ground of his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
.
Finally
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in this residential towers have a spectacular view to the city.

In conclusion
, there are convincing arguments both for and against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in high rise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartments
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I believe that benefit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
would outweigh the drawbacks.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that living in high-rise apartments feels very lonely and makes people unhappy. Others say there are advantages to living in a big apartment building. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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