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Some people say that family has the most powerful influence in a child's development. Other's say that other factors such as (television, friend, music etc. ) play a greater role today. Discuss + and -. v.1

Some people say that family has the most powerful influence in a child's development. Other's say that other factors such as (television, friend, music etc. ) play a greater role today. Discuss + and -. v. 1
In recent decades, there has been a major debate on whether gasoline powered vehicles should be banned, and on whether electric vehicles should replace them. Personally, I strongly advocate the ban on fossil fuel powered cars and electric cars replacing them. This essay will discuss how air pollution and the decreasing quantity of fossil fuels supports this view. Firstly, cars that run on fossil fuels cause air pollution and global warming. This is because these cars emit exhaust gases that come out of their exhaust pipes. Carbon dioxide is the main component of these gases which produces global warming. The oil and gas industries that are running primarily for the production of fossil fuels also contribute to air pollution indirectly. For example, according to a study conducted by Oxford University, 90% of air pollution is caused by fossil fuel cars. Secondly, as compared to the early days, the quantity of fossil fuels that is left is only a fraction. In the present day, there are millions of cars that run on fossil fuels in the world and all these vehicles are depleting the resources of fossil fuels. Also, different motorsport events that include a mammoth number of participants every year use a huge amount of gasoline which is a type of fossil fuel. For example, according to research conducted by the International petroleum organization, the world will be completely drained of fossil fuels by the year 2070. In conclusion, I strongly agree with the notion that fossil fuel powered cars should be banned and electric vehicles should replace them. Soon, all the vehicles on the road will be electric to ensure a healthy and pollution free environment.
In recent decades, there has been a major debate on whether gasoline powered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
should
be banned
, and on whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
should replace them.
Personally
, I
strongly
advocate the ban on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
powered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
replacing them. This essay will discuss how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and the decreasing quantity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
supports this view.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
that run on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and global warming. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
emit exhaust gases that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
out of their exhaust pipes. Carbon dioxide is the main component of these gases which produces global warming. The oil and gas industries that are running
primarily
for the production of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
also
contribute to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
indirectly
.
For example
, according to a study conducted by Oxford University, 90% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
is caused
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
cars.

Secondly
, as compared to the early days, the quantity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
that is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a fraction. In the present day, there are millions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
that run on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
in the world and all these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
are depleting the resources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
.
Also
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
motorsport
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
that include a mammoth number of participants every year
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a huge amount of gasoline which is a type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
.
For example
, according to research conducted by the International petroleum organization, the world will be completely drained of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
by the year 2070.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the notion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
powered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
should
be banned
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
should replace them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Soon
, all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
on the road will be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electric
to ensure a healthy and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
free environment.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Some people say that family has the most powerful influence in a child's development. Other's say that other factors such as (television, friend, music etc. ) play a greater role today. Discuss + and -. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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