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Some people say that E-books and modern technology will totally replace traditional newspaper and magazines. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people say that E-books and modern technology will totally replace traditional newspaper and magazines. v. 1
Our life is surrounded by numerous types of technological devices that some of them use are using to catch information. By emerging digital books and the websites of news and science, some people believe that technology will completely cause them to disappear print out books. I would agree that the number of printed books will decrease significantly in the future, but I do believe that paper-based books will never be replaced totally. The number of people who use E-books and computers for reading, increase dramatically in the last decades. Perhaps the main reason why reading news and books on the internet are becoming the first priority for some people is that, people can read the latest news at the moment so they are still updated. Besides, they can access the content of the articles and books easily. Take some researchers as an example, sometimes they should find a specific sentence in the book, it is clear that browsing through the E-books for finding this word is more convenient than paper-based books. Although the use of digital books is becoming more popular, the importance of traditional books and magazines should not be ignored. It is considered that the radiation of the computer screen would cause eye irritation, and give a negative effect on their eyes' health, so some people have a tendency to use these books instead of E-books. Such as the case for me, when reading a book by computer, my eyes are sure to itching. In addition, in some areas people suffer from a lack of access to the internet and advanced facilities, hence they have no choice and they should use traditional books for their purposes. In conclusion, I believe that despite all progress in technology, the role of paper-based books should not be denied and we need both of them for our aims.
Our life
is surrounded
by numerous types of technological devices that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
are using to catch information. By emerging digital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and the websites of news and science,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that technology will completely cause them to disappear print out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
. I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the number of printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
will decrease
significantly
in the future,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I do believe that paper-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
will never
be replaced
totally
.

The number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
E-books and computers for reading, increase
dramatically
in the last decades. Perhaps the main reason why reading news and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
on the internet are becoming the
first
priority for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can read the latest news at the moment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they are
still
updated.
Besides
, they can access the content of the articles and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
easily
. Take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
researchers as an example,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
they should find a specific sentence in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that browsing through the E-books for finding this word is more convenient than paper-based books.

Although the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of digital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
is becoming more popular, the importance of traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and magazines should not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
. It
is considered
that the radiation of the computer screen would cause eye irritation, and give a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on their eyes' health,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a tendency to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
instead
of E-books. Such as the case for me, when reading a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
by computer, my eyes are sure to itching.
In addition
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
areas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suffer from a lack of access to the internet and advanced facilities,
hence
they have no
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
choice and
they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
for their purposes.

In conclusion
, I believe that despite all progress in technology, the role of paper-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
should not be
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
denied and
we need both of them for our aims.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Some people say that E-books and modern technology will totally replace traditional newspaper and magazines. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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