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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? v.34

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? v. 34
A question which many of us have to ask ourselves is whether various forms of advertisement are luring buyers into buying more than they can afford or they are increasing awareness of useful commercial products. On one hand, I am inclined to believe that shoppers undoubtedly must take into account the financial risks which are inherent in advertising. On the other hand, hardly can we deny the effectiveness of advertising as a business tool. To assess the potential danger of commercials, we must bring the monetary aspect into focus. Assuming an individual was enticed into buying non-essential kitchen appliances solely because of the attractive visual appearance, he might later find his kitchen counters occupied by this equipment. Not only would such an individual never touch those items, but he would also find his money, as well as time, being wasted. In addition, the amount of time that they have spent on scrolling or looking at the screen on their personal devices could have been used for doing other domestic chores such as preparing a meal for the family or spending time hanging out with their kids. Another risk they might fail to avoid is being tricked into buying products of low quality. Although one can readily draw the conclusion that adverts have proven somewhat risky, we must put the benefits of them into perspective before judging whether they are truly bad. Being used as an instrument by businesses to market products that they are proud of, advertisements inform prospective customers about how those products are capable of improving everyone’s life. For instance, a nine-to-five worker may find it time-consuming to do research before making a purchase since there is a heavy workload waiting for them to finish, whereas they can just take a look at some television commercials and figure out which brand is well-known and trustworthy. On top of that, a well-designed advertisement is also a creative work of art that conveys both the aim of the company and artistic inspiration. Taking both sides into consideration, they point me to the conclusion that in principle, advertising can be a great source of information for the consumers, but in practice, those customers must be cautious to not get carried away by their spending habits. As is for everything else in life, moderation is the key to lasting enjoyment.
A question which
many
of us
have to
ask ourselves is whether various forms of advertisement are luring buyers into buying more than they can
afford or
they are increasing awareness of useful commercial
products
. On one hand, I
am inclined
to believe that shoppers
undoubtedly
must
take into account the financial
risks
which are inherent in advertising.
On the other hand
, hardly can we deny the effectiveness of advertising as a business tool.

To assess the potential
danger
of commercials, we
must
bring the monetary aspect into focus. Assuming an individual
was enticed
into buying non-essential kitchen appliances
solely
because
of the attractive visual appearance, he might later find his kitchen counters occupied by this equipment. Not
only
would such an individual never touch those items,
but
he would
also
find his money,
as well
as time,
being wasted
.
In addition
, the amount of time that they have spent on scrolling or looking at the screen on their personal devices could have been
used
for doing other domestic chores such as preparing a meal for the family or spending time hanging out with their kids. Another
risk
they might fail to avoid is
being tricked
into buying
products
of low quality.

Although one can
readily
draw the conclusion that adverts have proven somewhat risky, we
must
put the benefits of them into perspective
before
judging whether they are
truly
bad
. Being
used
as an instrument by businesses to market
products
that they are proud of, advertisements inform prospective customers about how those
products
are capable of improving everyone’s life.
For instance
, a nine-to-five worker may find it time-consuming to do research
before
making a
purchase
since there is a heavy workload waiting for them to finish, whereas they can
just
take a
look
at
some
television commercials and figure out which brand is well-known and trustworthy.
On top of that
, a well-designed advertisement is
also
a creative work of art that conveys both the aim of the
company
and artistic inspiration.

Taking both sides into consideration, they point me to the conclusion that in principle, advertising can be a great source of information for the consumers,
but
in practice, those customers
must
be cautious to not
get
carried away by their spending habits. As is for everything else in life, moderation is the key to lasting enjoyment.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? v. 34

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
388 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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