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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.16

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? v. 16
Advertisement is a means of creating awareness about certain products and services that improve our lives. Some school of thoughts have come up to say that advertising enhances impulse buying. In my opinion, I agree with the idea that advertisement informs us about new products and prices which improves life. To begin with, the main purpose of advertising products is to create public awareness of the goods in the market. Advertising aids public perception and acceptance of the products and services. If some products are not advertised, there won’t be public knowledge of them. For instance, few years ago, my family had to go on vacation to Miami and we needed a travel agent to help with our bookings. We got a good consultant from an Ad my dad saw in the daily magazine. Also, there are certain products that have been improved as a result of advancement in technology. These products can only be purchased by people who are aware of its upgrade. In addition, the various channels of advertisement enhance public awareness of product prices. This would protect consumers from price exploitation and ensure price reduction among competitors. For instance, a study in 2018 by the Small-Scale Association revealed that the price of all 250g of detergents in the Nigerian market are at par. This was as a result of Klin advertising its products for N500, all other producer of similar brand had to lower their price to the advertised price. In conclusion, advertising may have its own drawbacks, however, I agree that advertising is a useful tool to improving the lives of people as product availability and price awareness are made known to the public.
Advertisement is a means of creating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awareness
about certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and services that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
school of thoughts have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up to say that advertising enhances impulse buying. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that advertisement informs us about new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
life.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the main purpose of advertising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
is to create
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awareness
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
in the market. Advertising aids
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
perception and acceptance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and services. If
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are not advertised, there won’t be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
knowledge of them.
For instance
, few years ago, my family had to go on vacation to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
Miami and
we needed a travel agent to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
with our bookings. We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
consultant from an Ad my dad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
in the daily magazine.
Also
, there are certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that have been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
as a result
of advancement in technology. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are aware of its upgrade.

In addition
, the various channels of advertisement enhance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awareness
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
. This would protect consumers from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
exploitation and ensure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
reduction among competitors.
For instance
, a study in 2018 by the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Small
-Scale Association revealed that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of all 250g of detergents in the Nigerian market are at par. This was
as a result
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Klin
advertising its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
for N500, all other producer of similar brand had to lower their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
to the advertised price.

In conclusion
, advertising may have its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
drawbacks,
however
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that advertising is a useful tool to improving the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
availability and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awareness
are made
known to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? v. 16

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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