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In many countries, people are living in a “throwaway society” where things are used for a short time and thrown away. What are the causes of this and what problems does it lead to? v.4

In many countries, people are living in a “throwaway society” where things are used for a short time and thrown away. What are the causes of this and what problems does it lead to? v. 4
Quite a lot of countries are suffering with people belonging to live in a “throwaway society”, where the materials are used for a minimum period and then they are disposed. This essay will illustrate the reasons for this situation and the consequences of them. This generation people do not know the pain of earning each penny. This is likely to be the major reason for such a pathetic situation. However, this generation kid play an important for creation of such an environment. Parents are not willing to show the pain that they faced in their earlier days, as a result they start to provide luxury. The importance of materials and their cost is vanished. As an illustration, I personally feel responsible for this. My needs are always fulfilled by my parents, without negotiation, they tend to ensure I get whatever I want. As a result, I should give personal care to all of them I get. While, I tend to get bored of those items so easily and make it as a crap so that I would get a new one. A Few years ago, I got a brand-new phone, but as days passed, I turned out to show interest over a new mobile. If I had known the value of my old product, I would have not done this. As a result, money’s respect is lost. Habit of recycling has also gone down, which has also increased the presence many harmful pollutants. They release a lot of toxic gas, which is dangerous to health. Well, this is the duty of every citizen to create awareness to practise reuse, recycle and refuse. For example, as I am a student, I usually use a lot of notebooks. Instead of wasting papers and cutting down trees, I recycle every used page and reuse them for practising my lessons. But this needs to be cultivated in all individuals, as this will also increase the chances of rainfall in all the areas. As manufacturing of paper requires destruction of trees. In conclusion, this essay showed the reasons for people getting involved in a “throwaway society” and the impacts created by them. Well, it is depicted that the value of money and product is lost among this generation teenagers. It is interesting to note that parents are the backbone of this miserable state.
Quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
countries are suffering with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
belonging to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a “throwaway society”, where the materials are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for a minimum
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
period and
then they
are disposed
. This essay will illustrate the reasons for this situation and the consequences of them.

This generation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not know the pain of earning each penny.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
This
is likely to be the major reason for such a pathetic situation.
However
, this generation kid play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for creation of such an environment. Parents are not willing to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the pain that they faced in their earlier days,
as a result
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to provide luxury. The importance of materials and their cost
is vanished
. As an illustration, I
personally
feel responsible for this. My needs are always fulfilled by my parents, without negotiation, they tend to ensure I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
whatever I want.
As a result
, I should give personal care to all of them I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
. While, I tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
In standard English it's more accepted to use "bored with" or "bored by".
bored of
those items
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
easily
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it as a crap
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a new one. A Few years ago, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a brand-new phone,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
as days passed, I turned out to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
interest over a new mobile. If I had known the value of my
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
product, I would have not done this.
As a result
, money’s respect
is lost
.

Habit of recycling has
also
gone down, which has
also
increased the presence
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
harmful pollutants. They release
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
toxic gas, which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
to health. Well, this is the duty of every citizen to create awareness to
Possible spelling mistake. 'practise' is British English.
practise
reuse, recycle and refuse.
For example
, as I am a student, I
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
notebooks.
Instead
of wasting papers and cutting down trees, I recycle every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
page and reuse them for
Possible spelling mistake. 'practising' is British English.
practising
my lessons.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
this needs to
be cultivated
in all individuals, as this will
also
increase the chances of rainfall in all the areas.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
manufacturing of paper requires destruction of trees.

In conclusion
, this essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
the reasons for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
getting involved in a “throwaway society” and the impacts created by them. Well, it
is depicted
that the value of money and product
is lost
among this generation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
. It is interesting to note that parents are the backbone of this miserable state.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay In many countries, people are living in a “throwaway society” where things are used for a short time and thrown away. What are the causes of this and what problems does it lead to? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
388 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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