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Some people say that a person s success is as a result of the way he has been brought up by his parents Do you agree or disagree v.2

Some people say that a person s success is as a result of the way he has been brought up by his parents v. 2
There are numerous factors which influence a child’s development. According to many individuals, parents play an instrumental role in shaping their children’s success. In my opinion, I profoundly agree with this assertion as parents instill ethical and moral values since their childhood. To begin with, Parents are the most relevant people to guide their children for every crucial decision of children’s life. In other words, they are the one who knows the strength, weakness and interest of their child as they spend a maximum lifetime with them. Therefore, as per the capability of a child, they provide the most appropriate advice which is quite helpful to excel their personal and professional goals. They are the one who imparts moral and ethical values which are essential to become a successful person. For instance, in his autobiography, A P J Abdul Kalam mentioned that his parent’s modest nature and hardworking attitude influenced him a lot to become a better person and strive hard to do something for the betterment of the entire nation. Hence, it is undeniable that children’s success bloom under the parent' s guidance. Furthermore, parents are the one who inspired the most to their children. Since childhood, children follow their parents as a role model and want to become like them. Usually, children opt the same profession of their parents because they get such upbringing which plays a pivotal role to become successful in that field. For example, most of the film industry celebrities’ parent also belong to the movie world. Therefore, it is visible that children' s success is significantly dependent on how they brought up by their parents. To conclude, it is irrefutable that parents play a crucial role in the holistic development of their children. Under the parent’s direction and supervision, children get success without any great extent of struggles. Thus, it is apparent to me that upbringing of a child by his parents directly influenced the success of a child most.
There are numerous factors which influence a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child’s
development. According to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
play an instrumental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in shaping their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. In my opinion, I
profoundly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this assertion as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
instill ethical and moral values since their childhood.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
are the most relevant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to guide their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
for every crucial decision of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
life.
In other words
, they are the one who knows the strength, weakness and interest of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
as they spend a maximum lifetime with them.
Therefore
, as per the capability of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
, they provide the most appropriate advice which is quite helpful to excel their personal and professional goals. They are the one who imparts moral and ethical values which are essential to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
a successful person.
For instance
, in his autobiography, A P J Abdul
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kalam
mentioned that his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent’s
modest nature and hardworking attitude influenced him a lot to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
a better person and strive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to do something for the betterment of the entire nation.
Hence
, it is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
bloom under the
Possible spelling mistake found.
parent&
#039; s guidance.

Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are the one who inspired the most to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Since childhood,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
follow their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
model and want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
like them.
Usually
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
opt the same profession of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
such upbringing which plays a pivotal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
successful in that field.
For example
, most of the film industry celebrities’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
also
belong to the movie world.
Therefore
, it is visible that
Possible spelling mistake found.
children&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
is
significantly
dependent on how they brought up by their parents.

To conclude
, it is irrefutable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
play a crucial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in the holistic development of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Under the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent’s
direction and supervision,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
without any great extent of struggles.
Thus
, it is apparent to me that upbringing of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
by his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
directly
influenced the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
most.
18Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
40Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that a person s success is as a result of the way he has been brought up by his parents v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
326 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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