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Some people say thai too much attetion and resources are given in the protection of wild animals and birds. Do you agree or disagree about this opinion? v.1

Some people say thai too much attetion and resources are given in the protection of wild animals and birds. about this opinion? v. 1
Urban societies nowadays are influenced by human beings' events. In addition, these events cause global warming problems to become more serious. Nonetheless, there are persuasive reasons to examine this issue in depth. One of the main man-made activities of causing temperatures rising is carbon dioxide, which mostly comes from using transportation, such as cars, air planes and trains. Take cars using, for example, almost every family has a vehicle recently and it will excrete intense carbon dioxide. Furthermore, most countries now have a few trees or forests to adjust weather. Therefore, for such examples, it demonstrates that increasing CO2 is one of the important reasons for influencing global warming. Another man-made event to cause results in growing temperature is the fossil fuel. Nonetheless, a lot of high tech factories need to use such kinds of fuels to operate. Hence, our growth in technology, meanwhile creating pollution for the environment as well. However, we cannot only focus on how to lift the economy, people also have to know the importance of the influences. Consequently, it can be said that fossil fuel is parts of resources for global warming. Nonetheless, we can't let these difficulties keep going down. Even though this challenge is produced by the man, we believe that civilian also have abilities to improve the situation. After all, the problems don’t come out of the blue. Therefore, we need to focus on environmental protection by taking public transportation instead of driving own cars, planting trees and using more green energy, such as wind or solar energy. To sum up, improving the surroundings is the emergency mission for all of us.
Urban societies nowadays
are influenced
by human beings'
events
.
In addition
, these
events
cause global warming problems to become more serious. Nonetheless, there are persuasive reasons to examine this issue in depth.

One of the main
man
-made activities of causing temperatures rising is carbon dioxide, which
mostly
comes
from using transportation, such as cars, air
planes
and trains. Take cars using,
for example
, almost every family has a vehicle recently and it will excrete intense carbon dioxide.
Furthermore
, most countries
now
have a few trees or forests to adjust weather.
Therefore
, for such examples, it demonstrates that increasing CO2 is one of the
important
reasons for influencing global warming.

Another
man
-made
event
to cause results in growing temperature is the fossil fuel. Nonetheless,
a lot of
high tech factories need to
use
such kinds of fuels to operate.
Hence
, our growth in technology, meanwhile creating pollution for the environment
as well
.
However
, we cannot
only
focus on how to lift the economy,
people
also
have to
know the importance of the influences.
Consequently
, it can
be said
that fossil fuel is parts of resources for global warming.

Nonetheless, we can't
let
these difficulties
keep
going down.
Even though
this challenge
is produced
by the
man
, we believe that civilian
also
have abilities to
improve
the situation.
After all
, the problems don’t
come
out of the blue.
Therefore
, we need to focus on environmental protection by taking public transportation
instead
of driving
own
cars, planting trees and using more green energy, such as wind or solar energy. To sum up, improving the surroundings is the emergency mission for all of us.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say thai too much attetion and resources are given in the protection of wild animals and birds. about this opinion? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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