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Some people say modern innovations bring lot of problem than benefits? Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people say modern innovations bring lot of problem than benefits? v. 1
The world has taken a huge jump in the field of technology and the civilization has been seeing wonderful discoveries, from smartphones to landing of space. Although with some inventions, sometimes there exists few repercussions; I still believe that the technological revolution of the contemporary worldworld is a boon for humanity. At the outset, there are many advantages that science has given to humankind. The most primary one is, undoubtedly, it has increased the comfort and convenience in life. For instance, the invention of air-crafts have made travel easy for any part of the world. Similarly, interacting with any person is no more a challenge due to voice and video calling invention. Admittedly, people in recent times have become citizens of a global worldworld, reaping the benefits of studying and working at places of their choice. Along with this, the trade and business have prospered, making people aware of different countries, opening a bigger global market for the people. During the old days, people faced the challenge of distance and time, so even countrywide trades were not flourishing. Nonetheless, no such limitations exist, which definitely compels to highlight the beneficial world owing to technical advancement. Moreover, the space science has blessed the field of weather forecasting. During the medieval era, people did not know about climatic changes in advance; making people lose their lives in case of sudden calamities. However, now days the weather is forecasted well in-advance and sea-sailors or fisher-mans' know about calamities, so that they do not risk their life. Hence, the benefits of such invention can never be ignored. On the other hand, there are a few drawbacks of innovations, such as youth misusing the telecommunication for unproductive reasons. In other words, many people seem to occupy themselves on smartphones, and wasting their energy playing games and communicating with virtual friends. Similarly, the invention of air-travel has led to air traffic and space pollution, which has hazardous ramifications. In conclusion, despite few negatives the blessings of modern innovations cannot be ignored. Undeniably, the world has become a better place to live with comfort because of these advancements. Thus, I firmly believe that creative ideas should be encouraged, and it is more a blessing than a curse for overall civilization.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
has taken a huge jump in the field of technology and the civilization has been seeing wonderful discoveries, from smartphones to landing of space. Although with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
inventions,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
there exists few repercussions; I
still
believe that the technological revolution of the contemporary
Possible spelling mistake found.
worldworld
is a boon for humanity.

At the outset, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages that science has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to humankind. The most primary one is,
undoubtedly
, it has increased the comfort and convenience in life.
For instance
, the invention of air-crafts have made travel easy for any part of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
Similarly
, interacting with any person is no more a challenge due to voice and video calling invention.
Admittedly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in recent times have become citizens of a global
Possible spelling mistake found.
worldworld
, reaping the benefits of studying and working at places of their choice. Along with this, the trade and business have prospered, making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aware of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries, opening a bigger global market for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. During the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
faced the challenge of distance and time,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
even countrywide trades were not flourishing. Nonetheless, no such limitations exist, which definitely compels to highlight the beneficial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
owing to technical advancement.

Moreover
, the space science has blessed the field of weather forecasting. During the medieval era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
did not know about climatic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in advance; making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lose their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in case of sudden calamities.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
days the weather
is forecasted
well in-advance and sea-sailors or fisher-mans' know about calamities,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
their
Did you mean "lives"?
life
.
Hence
, the benefits of such invention can never be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
.

On the other hand
, there are a few drawbacks of innovations, such as youth misusing the telecommunication for unproductive reasons.
In other words
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
seem to occupy themselves on smartphones, and wasting their energy playing games and communicating with virtual friends.
Similarly
, the invention of air-travel has led to air traffic and space pollution, which has hazardous ramifications.

In conclusion
, despite few negatives the blessings of modern innovations cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
.
Undeniably
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
has become a better place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with comfort
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of these advancements.
Thus
, I
firmly
believe that creative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
should
be encouraged
, and it is more a blessing than a curse for
overall
civilization.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say modern innovations bring lot of problem than benefits? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
373 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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