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Some people say it is a waste of time when plan for future. It is more important to focus on present. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people say it is a waste of time when plan for future. It is more important to focus on present. v. 1
Although nuclear energy creates inexpensive and renewable energy, world peace has been shadowed by the danger of nuclear weapons. I do not think that the benefits of nuclear energy outweigh the negative outcomes since it has negative effects on the environment and risks international peace used as weapons by some countries. In order to create nuclear energy, natural resources, which are the main elements of all the living organisms needed to use. Building the power plants by interrupting forests where tons of animals are leaving cause a disruption of the natural habitation of some living organisms. For instance, logging the forests and leaving the toxic waste into the clean waters are causing serious problems. Therefore, this disruption of nature affecting the natural circulation of life as a whole. Additionally, nuclear power has significant negative outcomes as it can use the create nuclear weapons. Due to representing radioactive threats for humanity, there is an international community where the use of nuclear power is examined. However, there are some nations that do not follow the globally accepted usage of nuclear energy protocols. For example, Iran and North Korea are the significant examples of this pressing problem by creating nuclear weapons to retaliate the other countries to whom they got a conflict. To conclude, even though nuclear power is a clean and easily accessible energy type, I believe the negative effects outweigh the benefits. This is because nuclear power not only threatens the environment, but also humanity since it's used as a weapon by some nationalities.
Although nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
creates inexpensive and renewable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
, world peace has
been shadowed
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weapons
. I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the benefits of nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
outweigh the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
outcomes since it has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effects on the environment and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
international peace
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weapons
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries.

In order to create nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
, natural resources, which are the main elements of all the living organisms needed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. Building the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
plants by interrupting forests where tons of animals are leaving cause a disruption of the natural habitation of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
living organisms.
For instance
, logging the forests and leaving the toxic waste into the clean waters are causing serious problems.
Therefore
, this disruption of nature affecting the natural circulation of life as a whole.

Additionally
, nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
has significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
outcomes as it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
The word 'create' is a verb. Did you mean the noun "creation"?
create
nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weapons
. Due to representing radioactive threats for humanity, there is an international community where the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
is examined
.
However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
nations that do not follow the globally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
usage of nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
protocols.
For example
, Iran and North Korea are the significant examples of this pressing problem by creating nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weapons
to retaliate the other countries to whom they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a conflict.

To conclude
,
even though
nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
is a clean and
easily
accessible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
type, I believe the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effects outweigh the benefits. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
threatens the environment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
humanity since it's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weapon
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
nationalities.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
Knowledge of languages is the doorway to wisdom.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay Some people say it is a waste of time when plan for future. It is more important to focus on present. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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