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Some people prefer to be surrounded by large group of friends and family for special events, like weddings or graduations. Others prefer to have smaller gatherings without any friends or family at all. which do you prefer? Use specific examples and reasons v.1

Some people prefer to be surrounded by large group of friends and family for special events, like weddings or graduations. Others prefer to have smaller gatherings without any friends or family at all. which do you prefer? Use specific examples and reasons v. 1
Man is a social being and friends play an integral role in his life. Some people enjoy being with lot of friends and family whereas others find pleasure when they are with and around few people. In my opinion, small parties are better than large gatherings. This is due to the fact that small function’s are more affordable, enjoyable and give me more happiness. Firstly, Big parties are very expensive to be conducted. There are several kind of expenses to account for. For instance, arranging a hall for 300 people and food for them is more costly than preparing a function for 20 people whom are familiar with. Additionally, there is cost involved in decorating hall, light and sound for a big function conducted. While in a small gatherings there none involved as additional expense. Hence, financially considering a small gathering is acceptable. Secondly, meeting close friends gives us more enjoyable moments than engaging with unfamiliar people. In a big gathering there will be people whom we might not recognize due the large crowd and meeting them is not as good as meeting our close relatives. For instance, in a large marriage function where there are thousands of guest i tend to stick to my close relatives rather than with unknown people. If I am with people whom I do not know I may not be enjoying the function. Thus, it is better to be surrounded by close friends and laughing with them rather than being with unfriendly people. Additionally, the friendship bond gets even more closer when spending more time with a small group of people. This in turn would result in strong and healthy relationship with them. Since, that small group of people are more trustworthy than a huge partying friends. For instance, frequent gatherings with my close friends has enhanced my friendship with them due to their truthfulness and trustworthy nature. Therefore, a small group makes me happier than big group of people. To conclude, enjoying and eating with small group of people is more worthy because it results in meaningful relationships which are long lasting rather than speaking and meeting lot of people in a function since its just a pastime.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Man
is a social being and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
play an integral role in his life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
enjoy being with
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
and family whereas others find pleasure when they are with and around few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
parties are better than large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gatherings
.
This is due to the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
function’s
are more affordable, enjoyable and give me more happiness.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Big
parties are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
expensive to
be conducted
. There are
Possible agreement error. The noun kind seems to be countable; consider using: "several kinds".
several kind
of expenses to account for.
For instance
, arranging a hall for 300
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and food for them is more costly than preparing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
function
for 20
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
whom are familiar with.
Additionally
, there
is cost
involved in decorating hall, light and sound for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
function
conducted.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "gathering"?
gatherings
there none involved as additional expense.
Hence
,
financially
considering a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gathering
is acceptable.

Secondly
,
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meeting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
close
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
gives us more enjoyable moments than engaging with unfamiliar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gathering
there will be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
whom we might not recognize due the large crowd and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meeting
them is not as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meeting
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
close
relatives.
For instance
, in a large marriage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
function
where there are thousands of guest
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
tend to stick to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
close
relatives
rather
than with unknown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
I am with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
whom I do not know I may not be enjoying the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
function
.
Thus
, it is better to
be surrounded
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
close
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
and laughing with them
rather
than being with
unfriendly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Additionally
, the friendship bond
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
even
Use only "closer" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more closer
when spending more time with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. This in turn would result in strong and healthy relationship with them.
“Since” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Since
, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more trustworthy than a huge partying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
.
For instance
, frequent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gatherings
with my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
close
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
has enhanced my friendship with them due to their truthfulness and trustworthy nature.
Therefore
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me happier than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To conclude
, enjoying and eating with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
is more worthy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it results in meaningful relationships which are
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
long lasting
rather
than speaking and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meeting
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
function
since its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a pastime.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
55Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay Some people prefer to be surrounded by large group of friends and family for special events, like weddings or graduations. Others prefer to have smaller gatherings without any friends or family at all. which do you prefer? Use specific examples and reasons v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
365 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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