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many museums charge for admission while other are free do you think the advantage of charging people for admission to museum outweigh its advantage? v.2

many museums charge for admission while other are free do you think the advantage of charging people for admission to museum outweigh its advantage? v. 2
Museum are the education places which is very beneficial for the human. Some people pay charges to enter the museum. Although, it has negative effect. I believe there have more positive views It can be denied that prices of tickets have detrimental effect on people, societies and museum themselves. From people perspective, they are discouraged to get information and knowledge, especially poor people cannot afford some amount of money. From society perspective, citizen have fewer opportunity to access significant places to learn history, arts, science and many other essential subjects. From museum presceptive, they cannot attain to educate the people. Moreover, they may have close the museum as they lose more of their customers However, i think to charge the people when they enter the museum brings about mybrid of advantages. Firstly, museum will have money to operate to overcome the business such as personal cost, equipment electricity and water bills. Secondly, they need to improve the infrastructure and also need to proper clean up the museum. A good epitome is that recent hindustan times survey that museum which sell tickets are better then those which do not charge for tickets in terms of places, managment and information To summerize, from all the angles I believe that museum should sell tickets at certain limits so that normal people can easily affort and also get knoweldge from the museum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
Consider using third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "is".
are
the education places which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial for the human.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
pay charges to enter the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
, it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect. I believe there have more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
views


It can
be denied
that prices of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
have detrimental effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, societies and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
themselves. From
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
perspective, they
are discouraged
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
information and knowledge,
especially
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot afford
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
amount of money. From society perspective, citizen have fewer opportunity to access significant places to learn history, arts, science and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other essential subjects.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
From
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
Possible spelling mistake found.
presceptive
, they cannot attain to educate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Moreover
, they may have close the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
as they lose more of their customers

However
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
to charge the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
when they enter the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
brings about
Possible spelling mistake found.
mybrid
of advantages.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
will have money to operate to overcome the business such as personal cost, equipment electricity and water bills.
Secondly
, they need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the infrastructure and
also
need to proper clean up the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
epitome is that recent
Possible spelling mistake found.
hindustan
times survey that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
which sell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
are
Did you mean "better than"?
better then
those which do not charge for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
in terms of places,
Possible spelling mistake found.
managment
and
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
information


To
Possible spelling mistake found.
summerize
, from all the angles I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
should sell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
at certain limits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
easily
Possible spelling mistake found.
affort
and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Possible spelling mistake found.
knoweldge
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Mistakes

IELTS essay many museums charge for admission while other are free do you think the advantage of charging people for admission to museum outweigh its advantage? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
227 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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