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Some people make new friends on social sites and Internet chat rooms. Some people think it is a good thing. Some people think it is better to make friends face to face. Discuss both views and give your opinion v.2

Some people make new friends on social sites and Internet chat rooms. Some people think it is a good thing. Some people think it is better to make friends face to face. 2
Technology has removed the distance barrier from the face of the earth, thus making it quite easy to befriend a person from the comfort of your home. Some individuals are of the opinion that meeting people on social media platforms is a positive thing, while others think the conventional way of making friends is better. This essay will discuss both perspectives and argue that while making friends the conventional way is better and safer, meeting friends online cannot be avoided sometimes. Some people are of the opinion that physical meeting is the best way to make friends. This is indeed understandable because many people are not really who they claim to be online, hence, they end up defrauding people. For example, a study at Harvard showed that the incidence of online theft has increased exponentially and this increase is proportionate to the increased use of social media in recent times. In addition, a higher level of bonding can be achieved between friends who meet regularly. Thus, based on these reasons, it could actually be better to meet and make friends in their/your physical world. In spite of the reasons above, I think social sites and social platforms have been very useful in bonding individuals from the ends of the world. Many individuals today are time poor due to the high demand of their workplace; therefore, they rarely have the spare time to socialise and have to rely heavily on chat rooms and online platforms. In addition, some individuals migrate, moving from a place with friends and family to a place where they have nobody for reasons such as education or career. These people rely on social media platforms to connect with others in the same age group as theirs in their environs. In conclusion, people use chat rooms to make friends globally today. Some people believe that it is better to make friends conventionally while others think that the use of social sites and internet chat room is a positive one. This essay discussed the two perspectives and argued that while it is safe to make friends physically, social media platforms have been extremely useful in bringing people together from different parts of the world and in my opinion, that is better and faster.
Technology has removed the distance barrier from the face of the earth,
thus
making it quite easy to befriend a person from the comfort of your home.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
are of the opinion that meeting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platforms
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
thing, while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the conventional way of making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
. This essay will discuss both perspectives and argue that while making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
the conventional way is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
and safer, meeting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
cannot
be avoided
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are of the opinion that physical meeting is the best way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
. This is
indeed
understandable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not
really
who they claim to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
,
hence
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up defrauding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
, a study at Harvard
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that the incidence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
theft has increased
exponentially
and this increase is proportionate to the increased
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
in recent times.
In addition
, a higher level of bonding can
be achieved
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
regularly
.
Thus
, based on these reasons, it could actually be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
in their/your physical world.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
the reasons above, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
sites and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platforms
have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful in bonding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
from the ends of the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
are time poor due to the high demand of their workplace;
therefore
, they rarely have the spare time to
Possible spelling mistake. 'socialise' is British English.
socialise
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
rely
heavily
on chat rooms and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platforms
.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
migrate, moving from a place with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
and family to a place where they have nobody for reasons such as education or career. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
rely on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platforms
to connect with others in the same age group as theirs in their environs.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
chat rooms to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
globally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
conventionally
while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
sites and internet chat room is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
one. This essay discussed the two perspectives and argued that while it is safe to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
physically
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platforms
have been
extremely
useful in bringing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
together from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts of the world and in my opinion,
that is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
and faster.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people make new friends on social sites and Internet chat rooms. Some people think it is a good thing. Some people think it is better to make friends face to face. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
374 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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