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Some people like to buy new phones, new desktop or other latest devices. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.3

Some people like to buy new phones, new desktop or other latest devices. v. 3
It is an irrefutable fact that the children are the key for the bright future of our next generation. In some nations, the rules among the children are tough, whereas others places have minor law for the children. In my opinion, the guidelines against children are not atrocious things, but up-to some extent, and in this essay, I would shed light on what are the causes before the reasonable conclusion can be drawn. There are several reasons why the countries have rules for the teenagers. The children who’s the age under 12-18 are the developing stage of the adolescent mindset. Because of this measure concern, the government made the regulation for youth, which secure the future genesis, such as some places are not allowed for the kids at the age below 18 years (night clubs, bars). According to the survey conducted by the university of Punjab found that alcohol and any other kind of drugs can affect the teenage brain which results loss of consciousness for the period of adulthood. On the contrary side, In some kingdoms like Arab areas have very tough fundamental for the youngsters, especially for the women that seems like a discrimination between girls and boys. For an instance, As per the report of a WHO which stated that the places have brute statute having less creative as compared to other countries and also, the crime rate among those cities are higher than others. To put in a nutshell, I pen down and say that to make our child destiny happy and successful, then having a rule is the best, but not as much as tougher that create the problems in further.
It is an irrefutable fact that the
children
are the key for the bright future of our
next
generation. In
some
nations, the
rules
among the
children
are tough, whereas others places have minor law for the
children
. In my opinion, the guidelines against
children
are not atrocious things,
but
up-to
some
extent, and in this essay, I would shed light on what are the causes
before
the reasonable conclusion can
be drawn
.

There are several reasons why the countries have
rules
for the
teenagers
. The
children
who’s the age under 12-18 are the developing stage of the adolescent mindset.
Because of this
measure concern, the
government
made the regulation for youth, which secure the future genesis, such as
some
places are not
allowed
for the kids at the age below 18 years (night clubs, bars). According to the survey conducted by the university of Punjab found that alcohol and any other kind of drugs can affect the teenage brain which results loss of consciousness for the period of adulthood.

On the contrary
side, In
some
kingdoms like Arab areas have
very
tough fundamental for the youngsters,
especially
for the women that seems like a discrimination between girls and boys. For an instance, As per the report of a WHO which stated that the places have brute statute having less creative as compared to other countries and
also
, the crime rate among those cities are higher than others.

To put in a nutshell, I pen down and say that to
make
our child destiny happy and successful, then having a
rule
is the best,
but
not as much as tougher that create the problems in
further
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people like to buy new phones, new desktop or other latest devices. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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