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Some people get into debts by buying things they don’t need and can’t afford. What are the reasons for this behaviour? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem? v.2

Some people get into debts by buying things they don’t need and can’t afford. What are the reasons for this behaviour? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem? v. 2
For more than centuries, man was happy to just fulfill his wants, particularly food, shelter and clothing. However, in the modern era, many people are aiming for needs, especially personal. Often times these needs are unessential and still bought at high risk. Most of the pleasure is at reach to many, thanks to the introduction of leasing and credit cards. With these, the term ‘affordability’ is out of question. As a result, no one is taking a step back while thinking about buying a product. In addition, advertisements too are grabbing the attention of buyers in a significant manner. Particularly, some of them promote EMI’s and zero interest credit to lure customers, and many times they are successful. But what are the consequences? Knowingly or unknowingly, many consumers face debts that sometimes may lead to adverse ramifications. Alongside buyers, banks and financial institutions too will face the effects. A good example is 2008 recession, where many banks in USA ran in to huge losses following unpaid home loans by its customers. The main problem however is the lack of awareness among public about the serious effects of such investments. In order to prevent such uncalculated risks, measures must be taken to raise awareness among people. Also, one must learn how to manage his budget in order to get a balance between necessity and pleasure. Keeping a ledger of income and expenses monthly would be very helpful and gives an image of how his budget should be spent. All summed up, the chances of becoming a victim of consumer’s society are high nowadays due to the surrounding temptations but his problem could be easily avoided by being aware of the dangers and having a rational attitude when dealing with money.
For more than centuries,
man
was happy to
just
fulfill his wants,
particularly
food, shelter and clothing.
However
, in the modern era,
many
people
are aiming for needs,
especially
personal.
Often
times these needs are unessential and
still
bought
at high
risk
.

Most of the pleasure is at reach to
many
, thanks to the introduction of leasing and credit cards. With these, the term ‘affordability’ is out of question.
As a result
, no one is taking a step back while thinking about buying a product.
In addition
, advertisements too are grabbing the attention of buyers
in a significant manner
.
Particularly
,
some
of them promote EMI’s and zero interest credit to lure customers, and
many
times they are successful.
But
what are the consequences?

Knowingly
or
unknowingly
,
many
consumers face debts that
sometimes
may lead to adverse ramifications. Alongside buyers, banks and financial institutions too will face the effects. A
good
example is 2008 recession, where
many
banks
in USA
ran in to huge losses following unpaid home loans by its customers. The main problem
however
is the lack of awareness among public about the serious effects of such investments.

In order to
prevent
such
uncalculated
risks
, measures
must
be taken
to raise awareness among
people
.
Also
, one
must
learn how to manage his budget in order to
get
a balance between necessity and pleasure. Keeping a ledger of income and expenses monthly would be
very
helpful and gives an image of how his budget should
be spent
.

All summed up, the chances of becoming a victim of consumer’s society are high nowadays due to the surrounding temptations
but
his problem could be
easily
avoided by being aware of the
dangers
and having a rational attitude when dealing with money.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people get into debts by buying things they don’t need and can’t afford. What are the reasons for this behaviour? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem? v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
289 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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