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Indviduals can do nothing to improve the environment only the goverment and large companies can make a difference, to what extent you agree or disagree? v.2

Indviduals can do nothing to improve the environment only the goverment and large companies can make a difference, v. 2
Owing to the problem, the rapidly increasing environmental problem is cause for the authorities as well as for citizens and companies. Therefore, everyone has their own perceptions, to keep the environment safe and healthy is the government responsibility as per some people, while others said that individual can do nothing without the help of higher authorities, for instance, government and entrepreneurs. I completely disagree with the above statement, this essay will give you a plausible reason behind the phenomenon and its impact as a result of the environment. To begin, civil officers will play a crucial role in maintaining the environment clean and healthy however, it is not only the government' s duty to keep surroundings clean and secure, although civilians ought to be responsible. At the moment, there are plethora of factors causing environmental problems to illustrate, factories in the urban areas discharging their waste in the form of fumes which contaminating the air continuously. These poisoned fumes have carbon dioxide and unburnt carbon which is dangerous for our lives. In addition, authorities have to make some legislation to control this pollution by moving those factories to the countryside. In the meanwhile, they must educate and aware the civilians that how they keep their environment clean and healthy. On the contrary, an individual’s ownership towards the environment cannot be regret. Every person needs to play an essential role to maintain their surrounding fresh and litter-free, they ought to be responsible for dispose-off their material in the provided litter bins rather than to throw outside which causes infection and leads towards health issues particularly in adolescents. Although humans keep their environment safe while not throwing the plastic bags in the waterways though, it too helps in the safety of marine life. To gist, I would like to say that if the local authorities and individuals works together, it helps to resolve this issue in a better way.
Owing to the problem, the
rapidly
increasing environmental problem is cause for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
authorities
as well
as for citizens and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.
Therefore
, everyone has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
perceptions, to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
safe and healthy is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
responsibility as per
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, while others said that individual can do nothing without the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
authorities
,
for instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and entrepreneurs. I completely disagree with the above statement, this essay will give you a plausible reason behind the phenomenon and its impact
as a result
of the environment.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, civil officers will play a crucial role in maintaining the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
clean and healthy
however
, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
government&
#039; s duty to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
surroundings clean and secure, although civilians ought to be responsible. At the moment, there are plethora of factors causing environmental problems to illustrate, factories in the urban areas discharging their waste in the form of fumes which contaminating the air
continuously
. These poisoned fumes have carbon dioxide and
Possible spelling mistake found.
unburnt
carbon which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
authorities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
legislation to control this pollution by moving those factories to the countryside. In the meanwhile, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
educate and aware the civilians that how they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
clean and healthy.

On the contrary
, an individual’s ownership towards the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
cannot be regret. Every person needs to play an essential role to maintain their surrounding fresh and litter-free, they ought to be responsible for dispose-off their material in the provided litter bins
rather
than to throw outside which causes infection and leads towards health issues
particularly
in adolescents. Although humans
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
safe while not throwing the plastic bags in the waterways though, it too
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in the safety of marine life.

To gist, I would like to say that if the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
authorities
and individuals works together, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to resolve this issue in a better way.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Indviduals can do nothing to improve the environment only the goverment and large companies can make a difference, v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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