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Some people from poor and rural backgrounds find it difficult to get a university education. Universities have to make it easier, especially for such groups, to get into them. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.3

Some people from poor and rural backgrounds find it difficult to get a university education. Universities have to make it easier, especially for such groups, to get into them. v. 3
A section of society opines that students from remote areas as well as with financial instability are not able to enrol in universities. Financial support from universities motivates these students to do further studies. This essay mostly agrees with the above notion, views related to this will be discussed in the subsequent paragraphs. To commence with, merit based scholarships play a vital role to reduce financial stress from economically weaker students. To elaborate, since fee waiver is given through scholarships, learners with less financial resources can plan for further studies without any hustle. Due to this, more focus can be given to studies. To illustrate, an article published in the Washington Post in January 2020 stated that 87% of the financially poor students of Southern Nigeria took scholarships to study in Universities. Hence, money provided by Universities assists these pupils to have tertiary education. Furthermore, providing free study material to students of high school in rural places contributes to a better preparation of university entrance exams. To clarify, study references can acknowledge these children about the exam patters and previously asked questions because the level of education is low in these places due to the scarcity of skilled teachers. As a result, these learners can prepare well with these study materials. For instance, a survey conducted by the BBC News in March 2020 stated that 89% of students of rural Nigeria found resource material useful for their entrance exams. Therefore, students from rural regions get the relevant knowledge to qualify their exam from the references shared by universities. On the contrary, giving more attention to rural students generates a feeling of inequality among university students of the city. To substantiate, as more opportunities are given to university learners from remote areas, others are deprived from these such as grants for research, hostel fee wavier and many more. Thus, pupils from urban areas enrolled in the universities feel biased when their counterparts get more facilities. In conclusion, economically weaker students can plan for tertiary courses when they get scholarships after enrolment as well as study material relevant to university entrance exam. Nevertheless, pupils from the cities often face partiality because they get less opportunities.
A section of society opines that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from remote areas
as well
as with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
instability are not able to enrol in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Financial
support from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
motivates these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to do
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
. This essay
mostly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with the above notion, views related to this will
be discussed
in the subsequent paragraphs.

To commence with, merit based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scholarships
play a vital role to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
from
economically
weaker
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. To elaborate, since fee waiver is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scholarships
, learners with less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
resources can plan for
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
without any hustle. Due to this, more focus can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
. To illustrate, an article published in the Washington Post in January 2020 stated that 87% of the
financially
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of Southern Nigeria took
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scholarships
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Universities
.
Hence
, money provided by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Universities
assists these pupils to have tertiary education.

Furthermore
, providing free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of high school in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
places contributes to a better preparation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
entrance exams. To clarify,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
references can acknowledge these children about the exam patters and previously asked questions
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the level of education is low in these places due to the scarcity of skilled teachers.
As a result
, these learners can prepare well with these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
materials
.
For instance
, a survey conducted by the BBC News in March 2020 stated that 89% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
Nigeria found resource
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
useful for their entrance exams.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
regions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the relevant knowledge to qualify their exam from the references shared by universities.

On the contrary
, giving more attention to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
generates a feeling of inequality among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of the city. To substantiate, as more opportunities are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
learners from remote areas, others are
The usual collocation for "deprived" is "of" not "". Did you mean "deprived of"?
deprived from
these such as grants for research, hostel fee wavier and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
Thus
, pupils from urban areas enrolled in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
feel biased when their counterparts
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more facilities.

In conclusion
,
economically
weaker
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can plan for tertiary courses when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scholarships
after
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolment' is British English.
enrolment
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
relevant to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
entrance exam.
Nevertheless
, pupils from the cities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
face partiality
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun opportunities is countable.
less
opportunities.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
43Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people from poor and rural backgrounds find it difficult to get a university education. Universities have to make it easier, especially for such groups, to get into them. v. 3

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
363 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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