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Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.12

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). v. 12
Extra-curricular activities would be considered an essential part of students’ life since they can be influential in shaping one’s character, therefore, according to some those activities should be included as a mandatory part of high school programs. In my opinion, there should be an urgent essence for high schoolers to have voluntary services as an obligatory part of the curriculum, that being so, it can be optional not for all students but just for some individuals. Doing unpaid services can be a practice to arise the sense of philanthropy in children along with what they may be taught as their lessons at school. On top of that, students will be acquainted with the very sense of empathy, to understand and share feelings with another human being. They would be blessed with what they already have along with losing themselves in the service of others and participating in a joyful teamwork experience. These days, due to the COVID19 pandemic, plenty of Non-governmental organizations with the help of youngsters are trying to provide underprivileged people with their livelihood packages which be a live playground for philanthropic actions. It is, probably, on the other hand, crucial for high schoolers to do voluntary tasks as it is an obligatory part of their high school program. Practicing such behavior as a lived experience can be, undoubtedly, advantageous in the future when they apply for a job and also empower them in a particular skill. Apart from the practical experience that one may obtain taking part in such services, nowadays, in most well-known organizations a person is likely to be asked about the unpaid services he participated or whether he would be eager to take part in any of those services in the early future or not. And one’s response would determine that may have the job or not, that is the question. Permanently, being involved in unpaid community services would benefit a person in so many ways and it should be obligatory at schools unless it arises the sense of being saddled with a lot of responsibility that they have never been asked whether they are prone to do it or not. When students are asked to do something, they have never experienced or they are not interested in, they may be frightened and in consequence, lose their self-esteem. Besides, because they have had no part in that choice in the future, they can be indecisive and subordinate who should be dictated for very tiny issues. In conclusion, compelling high schools to involve students in voluntary services can be of great value, but ignoring students’ matter of choice in doing those activities while some are probably apathetic may result in low self-esteem and obedient ones who can have no part in creating their future and decide for their lives since there has been forced to do what they were not enthusiastic about.
Extra-curricular activities would
be considered
an essential
part
of
students’
life since they can be influential in shaping one’s character,
therefore
, according to
some
those activities should
be included
as a mandatory
part
of
high
school
programs. In my opinion, there should be an urgent essence for
high
schoolers to have voluntary
services
as an obligatory
part
of the curriculum, that being
so
, it can be optional not for all
students
but
just
for
some
individuals.

Doing unpaid
services
can be a practice to arise the sense of philanthropy in children along with what they may
be taught
as their lessons at
school
.
On top of that
,
students
will
be acquainted
with the
very
sense of empathy, to understand and share feelings with another human being. They would
be blessed
with what they already have along with losing themselves in the
service
of others and participating in a joyful teamwork experience. These days, due to the
COVID19
pandemic,
plenty
of Non-governmental organizations with the
help
of youngsters are trying to provide underprivileged
people
with their livelihood packages which be a
live
playground for philanthropic actions.

It is,
probably
,
on the other hand
, crucial for
high
schoolers to do voluntary tasks as it is an obligatory
part
of their
high
school
program. Practicing such behavior as a
lived
experience can be,
undoubtedly
, advantageous in the
future
when they apply for a job and
also
empower them in a particular
skill
. Apart from the practical experience that one may obtain taking
part
in such
services
, nowadays, in most well-known organizations a person is likely to
be asked
about the unpaid
services
he participated or whether he would be eager to take
part
in any of those
services
in the early
future
or not. And one’s response would determine that may have the job or not,
that is
the question.

Permanently
,
being involved
in unpaid community
services
would benefit a person in
so
many
ways and it should be obligatory at
schools
unless it arises the sense of
being saddled
with
a lot of
responsibility that they have never
been asked
whether they are prone to do it or not. When
students
are asked
to do something, they have never
experienced or
they are not interested in, they may
be frightened
and in consequence, lose their self-esteem.
Besides
,
because
they have had no
part
in that choice in the
future
, they can be indecisive and subordinate who should
be dictated
for
very
tiny issues.

In conclusion
, compelling
high
schools
to involve
students
in voluntary
services
can be of great value,
but
ignoring
students’
matter of choice in doing those activities while
some
are
probably
apathetic may result in low self-esteem and obedient
ones
who can have no
part
in creating their
future
and decide for their
lives
since there has
been forced
to do what they were not enthusiastic about.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
37Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). v. 12

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
477 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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