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Some people feel that paparazzi should not follow celebrities and invade their privacy by taking pictures of them everywhere, while others believe this is just the price of fame. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words. v.6

Some people feel that paparazzi should not follow celebrities and invade their privacy by taking pictures of them everywhere, while others believe this is just the price of fame. v. 6
While some people think that paparazzi should invade the private lives of celebrity, others have a contrary perspective. This essay will discuss both views and state my opinion. In my opinion, everyone regardless of who should have a right to a personal life. Hence, each person's privacy should be respected. Fame requires a lot of sacrifice, one of such is one's private life. As a person's popularity increases, so does the number of media houses interested in one's personal life and without being careful, many unintended content can be in the news about a celebrity. For instance, Abraham Stella- a Nigerian musician's infidelity was exposed to her husband through a photograph of her that was taken at a private beach, leading to her divorce. Although it is important to respect stars' private life, the impression that the media trails their life helps them to lead a better life because they wouldn't want acts that can dent their image to be revealed to the public. Also, many of these celebrities want more people to be their fan. So, they will be more conscious and do only want can attract people to them. As an illustration, an ex-housemate of a reality television show dumped his bad habits after he rose to fame through the program. In conclusion, while some believe that the media should monitor the personal lives of celebrities, I strongly believe that people should be allowed to keep their personal lifestyle private and make public only the aspects they are comfortable with sharing.
While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that paparazzi should invade the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
, others have a contrary perspective. This essay will discuss both views and state my opinion. In my opinion, everyone regardless of who should have a right to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Hence
, each person's privacy should
be respected
.

Fame requires
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
sacrifice, one of such is one's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. As a person's popularity increases,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
does the number of media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
interested in one's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and without being careful,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
unintended content can be in the news about a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
.
For instance
, Abraham Stella- a Nigerian musician's infidelity
was exposed
to her husband through a photograph of her that
was taken
at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
beach, leading to her divorce.

Although it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to respect stars'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, the impression that the media trails their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to lead a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they wouldn't want acts that can dent their image to
be revealed
to the public.
Also
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
want more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to be their fan.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they will be more conscious and do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
want can attract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to them. As an illustration, an ex-housemate of a reality television
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
dumped his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habits after he rose to fame through the program.

In conclusion
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that the media should monitor the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
, I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
lifestyle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
public
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the aspects they are
Consider using "comfortable sharing".
comfortable with sharing
.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people feel that paparazzi should not follow celebrities and invade their privacy by taking pictures of them everywhere, while others believe this is just the price of fame. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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