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Some people consider public libraries to be unnecessary due to the availability of the Internet. Others, however, believe that libraries play an important role in society. v.2

Some people consider public libraries to be unnecessary due to the availability of the Internet. Others, however, believe that libraries play an important role in society. v. 2
People have argued about the existence of public libraries. Due to the rapid development of information technology, a group of people believe that the existence of libraries is not necessary, while others disagree. The following essay will explain in details regarding both contradictory opinions, but I do believe that libraries play an important part in our communities. On the one hand, some people think the existence of traditional libraries is not effective and efficient anymore these days. With the development of computer and internet technology, people could find tens of thousands of references through the internet. Besides that, there is a new technology which is commonly called tablet PC, and people could read the electronic book through the device. Therefore, people do not have to bother themselves going to the library to find some articles. On the other hand, for a number of reasons some people believe that traditional libraries should continue to exist. Firstly, it is believed that there are a lot of old books and references that contain historical values and they should be properly maintained in libraries. Secondly, several people prefer to read articles or books in the library, due to the library could offer a quiet and comfortable place for studying. They believe that they could focus and concentrate more in the place. Lastly, not all books are provided in softcopy or electronic versions, therefore people might still search books in libraries. In conclusion, it is a fact that the existence libraries have been argued by a lot of people nowadays. Although with the assistance of internet and computer technology people do not have to go to libraries anymore, I personally think that traditional libraries still play an important part in our societies.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have argued about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existence
of public libraries. Due to the rapid development of information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, a group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existence
of libraries is not necessary, while others disagree. The following essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
regarding both contradictory opinions,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that libraries play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part in our communities.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existence
of traditional libraries is not effective and efficient anymore these days. With the development of computer and internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could find tens of thousands of references through the internet.
Besides
that, there is a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
which is
commonly
called tablet PC, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could read the electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
through the device.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
bother themselves going to the library to find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
articles.

On the other hand
, for a number of reasons
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that traditional libraries should continue to exist.
Firstly
, it
is believed
that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and references that contain historical
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
values and
they should be
properly
maintained in libraries.
Secondly
, several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to read articles or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in the library, due to the library could offer a quiet and comfortable place for studying. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that they could focus and concentrate more in the place.
Lastly
, not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are provided
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
softcopy
or electronic versions,
therefore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
might
still
search
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in libraries.

In conclusion
, it is a fact that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existence
libraries have
been argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
nowadays. Although with the assistance of internet and computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go to libraries anymore, I
personally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that traditional libraries
still
play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part in our societies.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
It is astonishing how much enjoyment one can get out of a language that one understands imperfectly.
Basil Lanneau Gildersleeve

IELTS essay Some people consider public libraries to be unnecessary due to the availability of the Internet. Others, however, believe that libraries play an important role in society. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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