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Some people consider computers to be more of a hindrance than a help. Others believe that they have greatly increased human potential. How could computers be considered a hindrance? Use specific reason and example to explain to your answers. v.7

Some people consider computers to be more of a hindrance than a help. Others believe that they have greatly increased human potential. How could computers be considered a hindrance? Use specific reason and example to explain to your answers. v. 7
In recent years, there is no doubt computers have big effect on every activities and life’s, therefore some people think computers had greatly increased human potential but some other people think computers had more of hindrance than help. While some people believe computers have many negative aspect on the people life in that using more computers types in routine life such as using computers base equipment’s in houses are have result on people who have not enough activities in routine life and then affect on their health and make people are more lazier. Moreover, many computers have some radiation that effect on human and animal’s bodies who are far away about natural life in environments However, in fact there are many positive aspect on people life. One of the possible negative consequences of using computers it maybe creation unhealthy issues but that negatives is mainly in result of incorrect usage of computers in that other people believes computers help people to increasing their potentials. People could planning to reduce unwanted negative aspect of computers which help medical and science technologies to protect people. In past people could not find and transfer their knowledge to each other’s easily but now they saving their data on computers to giving the others in a moment and specific time how that protect human educational activities to help their children. In conclusion, while human undoubtedly increase their potentials with using computers. They reduce any negative effect of computers. Ideally, computers controlling people life truly in recent futures.
In recent years, there is no doubt computers have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
effect on every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "activity"?
activities
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life’s
,
therefore
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
computers had
greatly
increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
potential
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
computers had more of hindrance than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.

While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe computers have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
aspect on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in that using more computers types in routine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
such as using computers base equipment’s in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
are
Consider using a past participle here: "had".
have
result on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who have not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
activities in routine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and then
Did you mean "effect"?
affect
on their health and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
Use only "lazier" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more lazier
.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
computers have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
radiation that effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
and animal’s bodies who are far away about natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in environments
However
, in fact there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "aspects"?
aspect
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
life.

One of the possible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
consequences of using computers it maybe creation unhealthy issues
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
that negatives is
mainly
in result of incorrect usage of computers in that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
believes
computers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to increasing their potentials.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
could
The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: "plan"
planning
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
unwanted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
aspect of computers which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
medical and science technologies to protect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In past
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could not find and transfer their knowledge to each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other’s
easily
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
Did you mean "they're saving", "they are saving", or "they were saving"?
they saving
their data on computers to giving the others in a moment and specific time how that protect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
educational activities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their children.

In conclusion
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
undoubtedly
increase their potentials with using computers. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effect of computers.
Ideally
, computers controlling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
truly
in recent futures.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people consider computers to be more of a hindrance than a help. Others believe that they have greatly increased human potential. How could computers be considered a hindrance? Use specific reason and example to explain to your answers. v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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