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Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. Discuss this view and give your own opinion. v.4

Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. Discuss this view and give your own opinion. v. 4
In the recent times, Vegetarianism is becoming a popular choice worldwide. For decades it has been argued that a vegetarian diet not only leads to decreased health problems but also provides humans a pollution free environment to live in. This essay will discuss both purposes and explain why I believe vegetarianism is a great approach for a healthy life along with making this world a better place. A meat free diet provides benefits of balanced nutrition along with reduced risks of cardiovascular issues. Vegetarian diets are extremely rich in fibre, essential vitamins and unsaturated fats, making food easy to digest. On the contrary, animal meat generally consists of complex proteins taking longer time to digest. Moreover, red meat is expected to increase cholesterol levels leading to multiple heart problems and increased blood pressure. For example, as per the latest study conducted by Harvard Business School, for individually following a vegetarian diet, risk of heart attack is reduced by 60%. Given the profound benefits of vegetarian food, it is increasing likely for a larger population to experiment going meat less in the near future. In today's world, meat processing industry is one of the largest pollutants in the world. The waste generated from these industries is let out in the water bodies causing a danger to the marine life. For instance, In 2018, due to increase in discharge of wastes in the lake, Port Douglas region witnessed deterioration of the quality of corals along with reduced species of seafood. Moreover, the slaughtering houses also increase the emission of green house gases, which in turn is leading to global warming. Overall, the meat industry will continue to pose these challenges and engage people in thinking about their dietary choices. To conclude, considering the benefits of health and environment, meat free diet will surely be a way of life for many. In my opinion, a small step towards vegetarianism could go a long way in creating a healthy life and a safe planet.
In the recent times, Vegetarianism is becoming a popular choice worldwide. For
The comma is probably missing here: "decades, it".
decades it
has
been argued
that a vegetarian diet not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
leads to decreased health problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
provides humans a pollution free environment to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in. This essay will discuss both purposes and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why I believe vegetarianism is a great approach for a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
along with making this world a better place.

A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
free diet provides benefits of balanced nutrition along with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
of cardiovascular issues. Vegetarian diets are
extremely
rich in
Possible spelling mistake. 'fibre' is British English.
fibre
, essential vitamins and unsaturated fats, making food easy to digest.
On the contrary
, animal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
generally
consists of complex proteins taking longer time to digest.
Moreover
, red
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to increase cholesterol levels leading to multiple heart problems and increased blood pressure.
For example
, as per the latest study conducted by Harvard Business School, for
individually
following a vegetarian diet,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of heart attack is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
by 60%.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
the profound benefits of vegetarian food, it is increasing likely for a larger population to experiment going
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
less in the near future.

In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
processing industry is one of the largest pollutants in the world. The waste generated from these industries is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
out in the water bodies causing a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
to the marine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
For instance
, In 2018, due to increase in discharge of wastes in the lake, Port Douglas region witnessed deterioration of the quality of corals along with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
species of seafood.
Moreover
, the slaughtering
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
also
increase the emission of green
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
gases, which in turn is leading to global warming.
Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
industry will continue to pose these challenges and engage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in thinking about their dietary choices.

To conclude
, considering the benefits of health and environment,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
free diet will
surely
be a way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
. In my opinion, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
step towards vegetarianism could go a long way in creating a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and a safe planet.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. Discuss this view and give your own opinion. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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