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Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school program. v. 1
Although, some human being's perspective towards the school authorities that they should teach descendants of the charity, teaching sports and many more. I agree with the statement to a large extent for some reasons. My position is argued further with the explanation. Out of all the arguments, the strongest one to prove my point is that from this services children can learn helping nature. This is to say, helping nature is beneficial for the pupils in the forthcoming years. Furthermore, they always learn to help the needy people. Moreover, the sophomore is learned social behaviour. By this I mean, they easily connect with all types of people as well as gain experience that they can get after providing lessons. To exemplify that, in the USA the educational sectors have made compulsory to teach pupils to work for charity and improve the neighbourhood. As a result, candidates took part in it and are now having a lot of social experience and are well planned for their future The other reasons to prove my point is that teamwork is a boon for the development of children. Because, if they do every work in a team then they will able to understand the behaviour of other children. In addition, the fact that by teaching them the programs that sophomores will understand better condition of poor people and provide them useful things. On the contrary, I would not overlook the other side too. It can be finally say that despite the fact of limited time for studies and affect the career my reasons that helping behaviour as well as teamwork are logically acceptable.
Although,
some
human being's perspective towards the school authorities that they should teach descendants of the charity, teaching sports and
many
more. I
agree
with the statement to a large extent for
some
reasons. My position
is argued
further
with the explanation.

Out of all the arguments, the strongest one to prove my point is that from
this
services children can learn
helping
nature. This is to say, helping nature is beneficial for the pupils in the forthcoming years.
Furthermore
, they always learn to
help
the needy
people
.
Moreover
, the sophomore
is learned
social
behaviour
. By this I mean, they
easily
connect with all types of
people
as well
as gain experience that they can
get
after providing lessons. To exemplify that, in the USA the educational sectors have made compulsory to teach pupils to work for charity and
improve
the
neighbourhood
.
As a result
, candidates
took part
in it and are
now
having
a lot of
social experience and are well planned for their
future


The other reasons to prove my point is that teamwork is a boon for the development of children.
Because
, if they do every work in a team then they
will able
to understand the
behaviour
of other children.
In addition
, the fact that by teaching them the programs that sophomores will understand better condition of poor
people
and provide them useful things.

On the contrary
, I would not overlook the other side too. It can be
finally
say that despite the fact of limited time for studies and affect the career my reasons that helping
behaviour
as well
as teamwork are
logically
acceptable.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school program. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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